The Difference of Wanting to Live
I was afraid you'd get mad at me.
The 8 bullets pierced my heart.
It was as if you were a small mouse,
Heart pounding,
Ears straining,
Waiting for the owl that you invision me as.
Laying down, drained of energy.
I'm dying.
I'm dying of the diseases the can not solve while you take for granite the one they can.
I'm not mad, mind you.
Not at you.
But at myself.
The laziness.
Being tired.
Being sick.
I want to match those girls in a magazine I've found under your bed.
I want to complete every homework assignment and get A's like I use to.
I want to wrestle, ride my bike, swim god damn it. But I can't because if there's the risk I'll hit my head ill die.
We're surrounded by a world of illusion cheating and romanticizing.
For that I am no match to the girl next no me let alone the magazine.
I can't get the good grades because my mind is rotten.
I can't live a long life because I'm ill.
I can however decide when my story ends and my last chapter.
So if you think I'll get mad just remember.
Remember the possessiveness and the meanness I've faced with you.
You may have quit but it fucked me up.
So if you think I'll be mad, just don't do it. Don't blame it on me or you, just realize there's stuff you can't do, can't see, in order for me to want to live.
The 8 bullets pierced my heart.
It was as if you were a small mouse,
Heart pounding,
Ears straining,
Waiting for the owl that you invision me as.
Laying down, drained of energy.
I'm dying.
I'm dying of the diseases the can not solve while you take for granite the one they can.
I'm not mad, mind you.
Not at you.
But at myself.
The laziness.
Being tired.
Being sick.
I want to match those girls in a magazine I've found under your bed.
I want to complete every homework assignment and get A's like I use to.
I want to wrestle, ride my bike, swim god damn it. But I can't because if there's the risk I'll hit my head ill die.
We're surrounded by a world of illusion cheating and romanticizing.
For that I am no match to the girl next no me let alone the magazine.
I can't get the good grades because my mind is rotten.
I can't live a long life because I'm ill.
I can however decide when my story ends and my last chapter.
So if you think I'll get mad just remember.
Remember the possessiveness and the meanness I've faced with you.
You may have quit but it fucked me up.
So if you think I'll be mad, just don't do it. Don't blame it on me or you, just realize there's stuff you can't do, can't see, in order for me to want to live.