loud thoughts

I think about you loudly
like just about anything I've ever been obsessed with
sometimes I think about how hungry leaves
and grass look right before a storm
I think about your hands
and the structure of them holding mine
and how, when I look at you,
in some way, you are holding me inside of you
but you are a loud thought
one that I just cannot quiet
I will think about baking cookies
or about how to grow flowers
or how I wish I new how to cook your favorite meal
you swell up and block out everything else for me
you become the sun
a ringing in my ears
all sweet in its siren, all fluid
an open ache
in the middle of movies,
of conversations,
of collecting my life,
you simply slip between the cracks
and just like that, I'm thinking about you again.