full circle or something

i cried twice a week, at least
hated myself for something i didn’t do
why am i like this? why am i like this?
took the blame for the bruise on my heart,
the bruise the you left.
the scars on my mind and my soul,
i thought it was love.

i swept up the pieces,
glued myself back together,
little by little, out of the mess you left of me,
i came out of the fire with a fortress around my heart.
so please, don’t tear my walls down again.
can’t handle it, not this time around,
i barely survived round one, lets not go for more

should i put it on?
i said, the coat or the condom?
he told me not to be difficult,
so don’t make me feel easy.
not some prize to take with the first place title,
or a consolation for the second best winner
i’m a lover of the losers, the fucked up, the broken.