bruised and brokenhearted

you told me i was the prettiest girl you had ever seen
you told me you'd never break my heart
you told me that you would never hurt me
you told me you'd never leave, you'd stay with me forever

you lied

when you slapped my cheek,
i thought it was a one time thing
i thought it was my fault
maybe it was

then came the hitting
you knew that id been through that before
you claimed to never do that
you claimed to love me

you lied

you bruised every part of me
except my face
"we must keep up appearances , baby" you said
i lied to cover you
"i tripped down the stairs" i said
i wanted to tell them, to blame your fist

you pushed me farther than i wanted to
threatening me
hurting me
i believed that you were the best i would ever get
your charley manson voice made me believe everything you said
when you said that you loved me, i believed you
i thought i loved you

i don't
i never will

you pushed me into cutting
the tiny slits not causing a fourth of the pain that you managed to deliver to me daily
i covered it up just like the bruises
it became as much as a game to me,covering up the pain, as it was to you ,causing it

i cried myself to sleep every night.
i felt awful
i felt ugly
i felt ashamed
i felt unloved

i stuck with you because i was afraid to leave
i'd be dead if all the threats came true
i was scared

now that the bars make sure you stay away from me
i feel safer

i didn't tell anybody about you
or all the pain you caused

i am now