Intolerable

To the terror
The revalation
The masochism
That feeds my obligations
And it never mattered at all

To act like him
Alternate routes
Ignoring my words
I should have known

To think I mattered
As if you care
How could I think you wouldn't speak lies
It's your nature
Substantiated reason
The life, friends, house
Should have clued in
There's a reason I trust no one
And you're my evidence

I'm just not learning like I used to
Making the same mistakes
You saved my life that day
But it would have been better
If yoou left well enough alone
Like you had any other day

Whether those secrets were true
Or made to keep me entranced
I still think about it
And though you may need help

That's what you have those boys for
If you can't tell them
How did you ever tell me?