I'm Not Worth It
You’re killing me
Slowly but surely you are
I hope it’s not intentional
But you’re leaving my heart with a scar
I love you; you love her
It’s not meant to go this way
But I’m just not good enough for you
So that’s the way it will stay
I never really asked you for anything
I just wanted you to be my mate
I tried my very hardest
But I’m still left in this state
Of confusion
What did I do to deserve this heartache that you’ve caused?
Of anger
Why is she so great that I should be ignored?
She isn’t! I shouldn’t be! I saw you first!
And don’t you dare say that I’m childish!
And while I’m at it I’ll dare to hope
My fairy-god-mother grants me a wish
I’d wish for you in my arms and her in hell
Call me a bitch if you want
Because deal with it hunny I am one
As for you? You’re a fucked up cunt!
I’m not gonna lie and say I don’t care what you think
Because we both know that’s not true
But sometime soon I want to here you say to her
‘Bitch I am so over you’
We have our little moments
Where we talk and much around
But don’t think I haven’t noticed
That these are getting harder to be found
It’s like I have to trap you
Just to make you say hello
And when I can’t make that happen
I’m left crying into my pillow
You’ve forced me into a cupboard
And you’ve shut and locked the door
Like I’m a problem you like to pretend doesn’t exist
And wish you could forget for ever more
Well sorry cause I won’t be forgotten
I absolutely refuse!
I wish just for one day
It could be me making you confused
But no; it’s me
Left hurting and alone
While the two of you get closer each day
I’m left sitting by myself at home
Wondering what I didn’t do
What I didn’t think what I didn’t say
How could you not love me?
When I so strongly feel this way
It’s been growing for a while
This feeling in my chest
Whether you’re being a jerk or the sweetest guy on earth
No matter what I like you best
You as a whole strangely enough
Are everything I hate
But when it is put together; to make up you
There is not a single mistake
It’s really not fair
The way you do this to me
I can be bawling my eyes out over the smallest of things
And it’s your smile alone that sets me free
No one else can calm me down
The way you seem to be able
Without you, well I guess everyone knows
That I would be quite unstable
She’s not; of course she’s fine
With you by her side
With eternal shame I must admit
When I see the two of you coming I turn and hide
I just can’t bear for you to see it!
The aching pain in my eyes
I’m not sure if I’d be able to hide it
Not even behind my strategically drawn disguise
I leave my mask in place through night and day
So nobody finds out
When I sit with my family in quiet compliance
I’d much rather scream and shout
‘What’s wrong with me!? Why am I feeling like this?!’
Since when have I become so pathetic?
But I can’t because it would be problematic
And besides, I’m really not worth it.
Slowly but surely you are
I hope it’s not intentional
But you’re leaving my heart with a scar
I love you; you love her
It’s not meant to go this way
But I’m just not good enough for you
So that’s the way it will stay
I never really asked you for anything
I just wanted you to be my mate
I tried my very hardest
But I’m still left in this state
Of confusion
What did I do to deserve this heartache that you’ve caused?
Of anger
Why is she so great that I should be ignored?
She isn’t! I shouldn’t be! I saw you first!
And don’t you dare say that I’m childish!
And while I’m at it I’ll dare to hope
My fairy-god-mother grants me a wish
I’d wish for you in my arms and her in hell
Call me a bitch if you want
Because deal with it hunny I am one
As for you? You’re a fucked up cunt!
I’m not gonna lie and say I don’t care what you think
Because we both know that’s not true
But sometime soon I want to here you say to her
‘Bitch I am so over you’
We have our little moments
Where we talk and much around
But don’t think I haven’t noticed
That these are getting harder to be found
It’s like I have to trap you
Just to make you say hello
And when I can’t make that happen
I’m left crying into my pillow
You’ve forced me into a cupboard
And you’ve shut and locked the door
Like I’m a problem you like to pretend doesn’t exist
And wish you could forget for ever more
Well sorry cause I won’t be forgotten
I absolutely refuse!
I wish just for one day
It could be me making you confused
But no; it’s me
Left hurting and alone
While the two of you get closer each day
I’m left sitting by myself at home
Wondering what I didn’t do
What I didn’t think what I didn’t say
How could you not love me?
When I so strongly feel this way
It’s been growing for a while
This feeling in my chest
Whether you’re being a jerk or the sweetest guy on earth
No matter what I like you best
You as a whole strangely enough
Are everything I hate
But when it is put together; to make up you
There is not a single mistake
It’s really not fair
The way you do this to me
I can be bawling my eyes out over the smallest of things
And it’s your smile alone that sets me free
No one else can calm me down
The way you seem to be able
Without you, well I guess everyone knows
That I would be quite unstable
She’s not; of course she’s fine
With you by her side
With eternal shame I must admit
When I see the two of you coming I turn and hide
I just can’t bear for you to see it!
The aching pain in my eyes
I’m not sure if I’d be able to hide it
Not even behind my strategically drawn disguise
I leave my mask in place through night and day
So nobody finds out
When I sit with my family in quiet compliance
I’d much rather scream and shout
‘What’s wrong with me!? Why am I feeling like this?!’
Since when have I become so pathetic?
But I can’t because it would be problematic
And besides, I’m really not worth it.