Feel So Alone

So tired of feeling alone
And abused
Left out and misused

Why is everything my fault?
Why does everyone always blame me?

I'm so tired of being hurt by the words you throw at me
The bullshit you say

No one knows the real me
They only see the mask I've thrown up

I pretend to be strong
And say nothing is wrong

But the real me inside
Is calling out for help

Wishing someone could come
And heal all my scars

And make the bruises fade away
The ones no one can see

Caused by words not fists
Angry words that make me seem useless

Why am I not good enough?
What did I do wrong?

I'd like to know so maybe
I could fix this

'Cuz I'm tired of feeling alone
And hurt

Why aren't I good enough?
First my father walks out

Now you seem to be retracing
The footsteps he left behind

When he walked away so long ago

It seems like everyone I love leaves me
And I can't seem to grasp the reason why

I'm hurt and all alone
Surrounded by people

Telling me lies
Hurting me
Without truly knowing it

I'm so tired of this shit
I want it to end

So I'll leave
It can't be that hard

I'll finish school and then disappear in the distance
New state, new place

Yea that sounds nice
I'll just leave

And never let anyone close again

________________________________________________________
I wrote this after arguing with my friends yet again. It seems like that's all we do lately. I'm so ready to graduate and head off to college.