Matt Friction Touched My Junk

On Saturday I saw the Pink Spiders,
and Matt Friction was really quite drunk.
After the show he wanted us to stay,
to do drugs and touch each others junk.

He asked us where he could score some coke,
but we hadn't the slightest clue.
Despite this fact, had he had the chance,
he probably would have attached us with glue.

Stacie told him a knock knock joke,
and he was anything but quick to understand,
he thought that she was requesting
a song made famous by his band.

He took us backstage and told us to wait,
after we said that we had to leave.
"You can't go! You've got to stay,
and do hardcore drugs with me!".

He tried to stop us on our way out,
I'm not even going to fake it.
He wanted to go to the bathrooms,
so he could see what we all looked like naked.

Then we left.