Why Do You Go Against You Will?

My language to you is a bunch of sound,
But please, oh please, just hear me out.
And by the trembling of your hands
I can just tell that you'll understand.

Busting down the door had scared me enough
My life without parents already is rough
My brother and I have little to eat
You think we might as well admit defeat.

At least let me live a few more days
I can barely survive with my own ways.
With a flick of that trigger, I will be gone,
Though the will of my parents was for me to go on.

You have kids, don't you?
I understand what you're going through;
Pain, understanding, undecision,
It's hard to kill a couple of children.

I beg you, please, have mercy!
I know you're serving your country
But leaving just us two, me and him
Will no tear you limb from limb.

I know you've killed, murdered, more
But I see no purpose in this war
You're a father, that we can see
So why would you have to kill me...

Why do you go against your will?