Where My Trust Lies

I trust you
I truly do
Do you trust me
Like I expect?
Can we hang out
Sometime around nine
Just to zoom around
On wheels
Too bad I found out
Only a bit too late
That all the things
The lies you fed me
Of course,
I see it now,
None of them were true
How could I have ever left
All my trust in you?

I’m standing tall
I’m standing still
I hope to God,
You’re not catching on
I will ruin it for you
I swear.

I’m jittering inside
Hardly able to think
As I try to remain
As stoic as possible
I need to keep away
From you
And all the stupid things
You used to do
As I try to remain strong
As the walls all fall
Around me
I’m smoked out by the dust
As my trust is ruined
As it slowly rusts
And crumbles away
Like the skeletons in the closet
Or like the other day.

I’m left with only
A spinning head
And black spots dancing
Before my eyes
I feel high,
Like on the edge of a dream
Like none of this is happening
But I know it is
Deep, deep down inside
I feel it in my bones
I want to run and hide
As the tears stream down my face
And you know something is wrong
You won’t comfort me
I’m so sure
Because you should be
The sad one,
Your ‘boyfriend’ just died
Wasn’t it last night?
I’m through with
All of your crap
You’re such a spoiled brat
I shouldn’t have put up with it
From the beginning
After all.

I’m sitting here
Puzzled and hurt
How could you do that?
Am I invisible?
Why all the lies?
Why treat us like dirt?
I’m about to explode,
I wish I could’ve been the one
That figured it out
And now that I think it over
It’s all to clear.

The way you acted
When I said his name
The way you lied
Played your stupid game
How I never even
Got to meet the guy
He was an actor,
A star,
He lives way afar
By the way…
I know why he died
But I won’t tell you now
‘Cause it’s too hard to write
It’s too hard to rhyme
Let’s just say you aren’t
Getting that laptop for Christmas
To bad you can’t see me
I’m rolling my eyes
It was too transparent
And now that we know
You’re suddenly sick
Is it the flu?

I’m not only mad at you
I’m mad at myself
I should have known
There were so many clues.

I’m not as confused
I can’t stand to be around
You and your betrayal
I know it doesn’t seem like much
But I actually cared
Felt sorry for you
Now I’m so ashamed
That I could even believe
It was the truth.

Don’t come crying to me
I’m done
I don’t like your schemes
You just dug your own grave
You didn’t need any help then
You don’t need it now
I know you’ll break down
Because I know you
Obviously not enough
But I’m sure I do
I mean, you’d had my trust
Just that once
You ruined it though
I’m not your shoulder anymore
Don’t cry on me, okay
Like I said
I’m done.

I know where my heart is
And I know where yours was
I know what I thought then
Just wish you could’ve saw
I know that it hurts you
Can you tell,
That it hurt me too?
I know why my heart cries
And I know where my trust lies
Both have changed,
Because of you.