Stardom

I’m always picking up on the vibes that I don’t like
And I get that feeling in my stomach that says something’s not right
It’s just so very awkward and I don’t know what to say
There’s nothing I can do is there? Oh, God, I’m not okay

I’m dealing with disappointment; it feels like I deal too much
And I’m fighting back the sorrow, but I can’t fight hard enough
I just shrug my broken shoulders, then lie down and go to sleep
While the pain stabs me again, I hope it doesn’t stab too deep

I guess I can't be your Darcy, you poor Elizabeth
I’m not in your heart, see? Guess I’ve got nothing left
So I’ll leave you to your books, and I’ll leave without my soul
And I’ll never read again if you want me to go

I guess I couldn’t show you how warm I could've made your bed
I guess I couldn't hold you, or write a poem you should’ve read
You thought libraries were quiet? Out in space, silence is bolder
And you thought you were cold? Well, I was ready, space is colder

I guess you never wanted to see the only star-
That I’ll ever reach, the others are too far
And you never wanted to share each others lives
So I guess I’ll sit here, reaching for the sky

You’ll be in your library; I’ll be out fucking up
You could reach the sky baby, but I never had good luck
You shouldn’t have to be afraid, and I just don’t give a damn
You’ll be the one in books one day, and I’ll be a broken man

It makes me go so numb, the fact it’s all the same
This was just like all the others, you just had another name
And it makes me feel so sick; it’s just hopeless isn’t it?
Guess I’ll have to deal with it, till I can get drunk and forget

And in my drunken dreams you’ll be my angel on the moon
I wasn’t good enough for you, or to walk on Martian dunes
So I'll drown myself in rocket fuel, and you get to be the flame
No, it's not just a simple suicide, it's my 15 minute fame...