Come Back To Me
The first time I saw him I was far from free
He moved past quietly, smiled at me
I was entranced immediately
He had a power that seemed more than mere personality.
I observed him roaming throughout the crowd
Kissing a hand, easily quieting the loud
Suddenly he was beside me, smiling, “It's warm in here, let's go out.
He walked with me and I let him talk.
I watched and learned: he cared about everyone, friends' devotee
After time, I questioned him coyly whether he cared about me
He grinned and punched my shoulder lightly
“Of course, girl, you're a friend and I'll always love thee.”
Alone I went back to my house and went inside moving quiet
Pretentious guardians demanded where I'd been in angry onset
I could not answer, full of friendship yet afraid of their threat
Too soon bruises turned maroon and navy and violet
He saw my broken and multicolored skin
He demanded to know what happened
I told him that my keepers punished me for my sins
That pain would keep me from stumbling now and then
He was enraged and swore that they were lying
He didn't understand that without guidance I'd be dying
I tried to explain but broke down crying
He held me close until my sobbing was sighing
That night they came and took that which made me see
In excruciating pain I cried, and he was the only one to hear me
Ran to me as I was dying mentally and mortally
Gave the pair who tore me down a most painful third degree
He came back to me as I lay broken on the floor
Lit a match to the old house's interior
Gathered me into his arms and carried me out the door
He told me I'd never have to cry anymore
He gave me a home and nursed me back to health
Told me to never give up, not to focus on myself
I live because he saved my life
When I tried to kill myself again he took my knife
He swore to me that if I died
He'd do the same and follow me to the other side.
We sat and talked for hours
In an aging elm tree's boughs
He told me stories, confident and loud.
Then told me, “I'll always protect you, I'm making that vow.”
A few years passed at the speed of light
He taught me how to win in a fight
Mentoring silently he taught me farsight
I asked him once if he loved me and he said he might.
One night we stood alone in the street
He took my hand and said he had to leave
He promised he'd come back for me
Morning saw him sitting dead by our tree.
I walked to him, slowly, in shock
Touched his shirt, touched the brown blotch
The snow drifted onto his eyelashes as I watched
My heart shifted and broke, like the tumblers in a lock
He'd written me a letter, he told me that his mother
Couldn't afford to feed sister and brother
Mom said to kick me out he told her don't bother
He told her he could get money like Father
Some teens in town owed him a few hundred
He went to collect and they saw red
They were a group, he was just one hothead
But now when they speak his name they speak it with dread.
They broke him and let him go
He was dying anyway so
He dragged him to my old elm tree and there took out my knife
With a few cuts he'd ended his life.
I ran away, as far my I could carry myself
Collapsed in the snow like a dusty rag doll thrown on a shelf
Death was too great, too strong a gulf
I wept with grief he'd never again hold me close to himself.
I wandered for days, starving thin
Kept hearing his voice within
Haunting every step and then
My breaking point came it was time to end.
I stood on distant bridge frozen and shaking cold
No fear I just felt empty and cold
Stared at the water whose embrace would enfold
Almost felt Neptune's arms reaching around to hold
I blinked then screamed those arms were real
I spun around to see who'd broken my moment of kill
I was frozen in time at that moment surreal
That worried face, those dismayed lips ideal
“Whatever are you doing?” he demanded
As he wrapped his coat around me I said,
“There was nothing left once you were dead.”
He gave me that reproving glare then kissed my forehead.
“Dear I'm always near,
Don't you feel the burning in here?”
He touched my chest and drew near
I felt the rush as I became the one I never feared.
He winced as if in pain and turned away
I took a step forward and he shook his head, “Stay.
“I begged to come back to save you when I saw you stray
They let me come back but when I return there's hell to pay.”
He staggered then fell to his knees
Held out a hand, his eyes stricken and mouth opened in a plea
“Come to me, come with me. . .”
And I stumbled through him with a scream.
I stood there silent and warm, his coat wrapped around
The only sound was the snow hissing down
I pondered his sacrifice, how he'd given both of his lives
To save his little sister from hell in a drown.
After a long time the world set in,
I grew older and moved away from then
But I've never forgotten
I forever have his freedom and fire within.
He moved past quietly, smiled at me
I was entranced immediately
He had a power that seemed more than mere personality.
I observed him roaming throughout the crowd
Kissing a hand, easily quieting the loud
Suddenly he was beside me, smiling, “It's warm in here, let's go out.
He walked with me and I let him talk.
I watched and learned: he cared about everyone, friends' devotee
After time, I questioned him coyly whether he cared about me
He grinned and punched my shoulder lightly
“Of course, girl, you're a friend and I'll always love thee.”
Alone I went back to my house and went inside moving quiet
Pretentious guardians demanded where I'd been in angry onset
I could not answer, full of friendship yet afraid of their threat
Too soon bruises turned maroon and navy and violet
He saw my broken and multicolored skin
He demanded to know what happened
I told him that my keepers punished me for my sins
That pain would keep me from stumbling now and then
He was enraged and swore that they were lying
He didn't understand that without guidance I'd be dying
I tried to explain but broke down crying
He held me close until my sobbing was sighing
That night they came and took that which made me see
In excruciating pain I cried, and he was the only one to hear me
Ran to me as I was dying mentally and mortally
Gave the pair who tore me down a most painful third degree
He came back to me as I lay broken on the floor
Lit a match to the old house's interior
Gathered me into his arms and carried me out the door
He told me I'd never have to cry anymore
He gave me a home and nursed me back to health
Told me to never give up, not to focus on myself
I live because he saved my life
When I tried to kill myself again he took my knife
He swore to me that if I died
He'd do the same and follow me to the other side.
We sat and talked for hours
In an aging elm tree's boughs
He told me stories, confident and loud.
Then told me, “I'll always protect you, I'm making that vow.”
A few years passed at the speed of light
He taught me how to win in a fight
Mentoring silently he taught me farsight
I asked him once if he loved me and he said he might.
One night we stood alone in the street
He took my hand and said he had to leave
He promised he'd come back for me
Morning saw him sitting dead by our tree.
I walked to him, slowly, in shock
Touched his shirt, touched the brown blotch
The snow drifted onto his eyelashes as I watched
My heart shifted and broke, like the tumblers in a lock
He'd written me a letter, he told me that his mother
Couldn't afford to feed sister and brother
Mom said to kick me out he told her don't bother
He told her he could get money like Father
Some teens in town owed him a few hundred
He went to collect and they saw red
They were a group, he was just one hothead
But now when they speak his name they speak it with dread.
They broke him and let him go
He was dying anyway so
He dragged him to my old elm tree and there took out my knife
With a few cuts he'd ended his life.
I ran away, as far my I could carry myself
Collapsed in the snow like a dusty rag doll thrown on a shelf
Death was too great, too strong a gulf
I wept with grief he'd never again hold me close to himself.
I wandered for days, starving thin
Kept hearing his voice within
Haunting every step and then
My breaking point came it was time to end.
I stood on distant bridge frozen and shaking cold
No fear I just felt empty and cold
Stared at the water whose embrace would enfold
Almost felt Neptune's arms reaching around to hold
I blinked then screamed those arms were real
I spun around to see who'd broken my moment of kill
I was frozen in time at that moment surreal
That worried face, those dismayed lips ideal
“Whatever are you doing?” he demanded
As he wrapped his coat around me I said,
“There was nothing left once you were dead.”
He gave me that reproving glare then kissed my forehead.
“Dear I'm always near,
Don't you feel the burning in here?”
He touched my chest and drew near
I felt the rush as I became the one I never feared.
He winced as if in pain and turned away
I took a step forward and he shook his head, “Stay.
“I begged to come back to save you when I saw you stray
They let me come back but when I return there's hell to pay.”
He staggered then fell to his knees
Held out a hand, his eyes stricken and mouth opened in a plea
“Come to me, come with me. . .”
And I stumbled through him with a scream.
I stood there silent and warm, his coat wrapped around
The only sound was the snow hissing down
I pondered his sacrifice, how he'd given both of his lives
To save his little sister from hell in a drown.
After a long time the world set in,
I grew older and moved away from then
But I've never forgotten
I forever have his freedom and fire within.