Fall In Love With Yesterday

And all I wanted to say
was that I'm sorry, I'll always be sorry.
I'm going to have to live with the pain
and the horrible regret that you helped fill in.
I will, no matter how much I hate it,
will always love you.
The taste of skin on the lips
moister, sweat, slicked, sheen.
I hate how you control me
how you control me oh so well.
Easy filled brown eyes
I want to say you're absolutely nothing to me.
But of course I'll be lying to myself
and you always said that that's the easiest way to lose yourself.
I'll write this down and reread it tomorrow
and figure out what we did wrong, and do nothing about the problem at all.
I'll beat myself up
and I'll get bloody knuckles and a bruised mind.
While you'll sit there
and act like everything's fine.
I don't want to pick up the razor
I don't want another scar lay on my skin.
But you know damn well that I'm trying to get over so much in my life
and you're helping by yelling and screaming at me.
Brown eyes
with the little gold specks.
They haunt me when I sleep
another thing I guess I'll have to work on.
The dial tone's hurting my ears
we'll fall in love with yesterday again.
I seriously cannot wait.