Characters - Mibba

Kaikoura

Gender:: Female
Age:: 17

~”Well -- *is forever interrupted*!” Kaikoura is shukaku132... in HYLIAN FORM! So special... She’s close friends with Midna and Rabia -- but despite her constant efforts -- is hated by Zelda. She’s blonde and kind of acts like she’s stoned at times, but we accept these things. She’s madly in love with Link, but everyone is convinced she’s in love with Sheik instead. She later ends up marrying him through an “arranged” marriage... set up by Zelda.

Demon Lord Ghirahim

Gender:: Male
Orientation:: Bisexual

~"The sight of your appalling hair makes my gorge rise!" Ghirahim is sadly not a gay mime, despite what everyone claims. He's pretty much a creepy pedophile (NO JOKE) and has this weird tongue thing... which is also creepy. He serves Demise and is hated by everyone... except Rabia, who thinks he's oddly sexy for some reason. Ew.

Malon

Gender:: Female
Age:: 17

~”Where’s my dad when all this is happening? o.o” Poor poor Malon... She was stolen from the farm one day, and hasn’t returned since! First, she was forced to marry Ganondorf. Then, she was forced to give him a CHILD (like EW). And third, she was stolen yet again -- but this time by Vaati! Well, actually that’s not too bad. But still, she hasn’t been having very good luck! Despite all this, she still stays optimistic and is a very carefree spirit. She’s still friends with Link, and she also still loves to sing.

Lord Vaati

Gender:: Male
Age:: 120

~”Is my quote better than Ganon’s yet?” Lord Vaati (usually just called Vaati) is a lavender not-so-evil villain. Sure, he CLAIMS he’s a better villain than Ganondorf, but this has never once been shown. He steals Ganon’s first wife, Malon, in an attempt to get revenge on him. However, he turns out to fall in love with her and gets her pregnant after a contraceptive spell fails him. (OW OWWWWW!) He created Shadow Link and his now his master, and is obsessed with playing Monster Pet Shop and DDR. Although he’s a “villain,” he’s very tiny and adorable -- making him very nonthreatening.

Ganondorf Dragmire

Gender:: Male
Age:: 38

~”Let’s have some fun this beat is sick, I want to take a ride on your disco stick!.” Alright, now that I’m going to be brutally ***ed... ON WITH THE BIO! Ganondorf is an angry Gerudo man ; in fact, he is the ONLY Gerudo man. He has a daughter named Kabira, who’s totally following in his footsteps, and has been married *counts this...* 3 times. His queen is (and his only successfullish marriage is with) Rabia. Basically, he’s always angry and refuses to do anything if it’s not done his way. So, he’s spoiled. (I’m so dead) (by 38, he means like 938...)

Tingle

Gender:: Male
Age:: 35

~”Mister Fairy?!” (FAIRYREINCARNATEDD) Yeah, Tingle’s fockin weird... but everyone knows that. He’s still obsessed with fairies and Link, and he still sells maps and tries to take your rupees and force gems. Same old Tingle, right? Yeah, exactly right. -__-

Princess Zelda

Gender:: Female
Age:: 19

~”A quote? Uhhh.... what’s Sheik’s quote? Can I use that one? Wait, why are you writing this down? I don’t want this as my quote!” Quite honestly, Zelda is a huge bitch. People either love her or hate her for this... and usually, people don’t love it. She claims she’s “hard to get,” but has a new boyfriend almost every other week. She goes partying and clubbing a lot with Rabia, and always wants to be the center of attention. She secretly harbors a massive crush on Link, but only because she thinks he’ll do things for her that most normal men would never subject themselves too. She hates Midna and Kaikoura for no reason at all, and is a horrible ruler!

Dead Zant

Gender:: Male
Age:: 27

~”-siiiigh- Forever alone...” Poor Zant is dead, single, and lonely. Rabia is one of his only friends, along with the famous Dark Lord, Voldemort. Could this be because neither of them really have noses? I have no idea! All I know is that Zant is dead, and doesn’t have many friends. In his spare time, he hosts parties and paints lovely watercolors. Like, truly, you should see them sometime. Just saying.

Sheik NOT Zelda

Gender:: Male
Age:: 19

~”.....” Sheik is a very reserved person. He spends much of his time saying poetic things, helping Link with his problems, and drinking soup. He’s very good friends with Link and Zelda, even though the two don’t always treat him very well. He’s put into an arranged marriage with Kaikoura, even though he’d prefer to be single. Oh yeah, and if you can’t tell, he’s a HE, not a she. Get over it, Femme Sheik lovers.

Shadow Link

Gender:: Male
Age:: 16

~”:3 xD -w- ;p ^ . ^ :D “ Yes, Shadow Link likes to make lots o’ faces when he types... But that’s beside the point! He’s a little creepo and likes to hit on or flirt with, like, anyone. He serves Vaati, and everybody believes he’s secretly in love with him. This has yet to be proven, however. He can teleport using shadows, but can only come out during the late afternoon or at night due to the position of the sun or something like that. His partner in crime is Rabia, and the two are often seen making other people’s lives miserable. But he's cute, so it's all good.