Chasing the Starlight - Comments

  • run away with me

    run away with me (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    32
    Location:
    United States
    Oh my god.
    I loved this! It was so amazing. Same with the prequel!

    I'm kind of confused, though.
    The italian, and russian guy was actually Gerard? Like, Gerard Way? XD
    Cause by the way you made him sound, it didn't sound like him.

    Okay, I'll stop babbling.

    I LOOOOVED THIS SO MUCH! OH MY GOD!
    February 16th, 2009 at 05:08am
  • arizona skies.

    arizona skies. (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    32
    Location:
    Great Britain (UK)
    This is stupidly late, I'm sorry about that. I owe you a review though for being second place.

    Firstly, I found it refreshing that it was set in Russia, rather than England or America. It was a nice change and gave it a different feel.

    The flakes spattered against her car’s windshield and instantly melted away, but outside they had transformed the world. The sky had become a wall of gray spilling down over the city in a fog, and she sighed. It was just like driving in the rain, but completely silent.
    That paragraph has to be my favourite of the whole one shot. You have a way of describing things really beautifully and in enough detail, but not so much that it drags down the story and slows the pace.

    I also like how you started the story off going in one direction.
    She began to shake her head, but stopped, closing her eyes. “It’s…well, me and Matt…”
    When I read that line, I thought it was going to turn out to be a cliche 'girl gets abused by boyfriend' story. A well written cliche story though :)

    Gerard tensed up at the sound of the name. “Do you want me to take care of it for you?”
    That also added to my fear of it being a little cliche. I'm happy it didn't turn out the way I expected it to though. I also find it nice that you portrayed Gerard as being very level headed and calm, despite the situation. It's different as most people don't usually write him like that.

    “‘If there is a person, there is a problem. If there is no person, there is no problem.’ An idea of Stalin.” The name nearly sent a chill down her spine, the very idea of Gerard’s suggestion suddenly seeming malicious and primitive to her, despite her past experiences. He drank some of his tea as if to dispel the cold cruelty of his own words.
    The mention of Stalin worked well. The description of his suggestion to her was really good too, and her reaction.

    The bruises on her also added to my thoughts of which direction this was going in. I liked how you put it in there and then changed everything as the story ran it's course.

    “Sorry…don’t know how I managed that,” she said. Instead of laughing at her like she thought he would, Gerard smiled and helped her stand, pulling her into a warm hug.
    I found that part to be really cute. It also showed that Gerard did care about her a lot. It also makes Lyn appear to be a little bit sensitive, as she seemed to fear him laughing at her, rather than helping her. It goes back to the mentions of Matt and the contrast between him and Gerard. She might have expected Matt to laugh at her, whereas Gerard didn't.

    There's a sense of panic when Matt appears with the gun. He abruptly turned the gun against her head, its cold barrel biting into her skull. She closed her eyes. She knew she could easily get away from him, but it felt like her years of training and experience had melted away into nothing but fear. When you mention her 'training and experience', I realised that there was more to this than an abusive boyfriend or something along those lines.

    I loved the twist at the end. It was different, even though at first I thought it sounded like a lot of other stories. It made a nice change, and I love the way you have the ability to describe things in such a beautiful, detailed way. The way you described the scene and the ice and snow made it seem magical and the gun being held to her head. I actually envy your description writing abilities. :cute:

    Well done with this, it was an amazing effort. I'll put the link up on my profile for you tomorrow.
    January 22nd, 2009 at 10:24pm
  • paranormality.

    paranormality. (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    27
    Location:
    United States
    :cheese: THIS. WAS. SO. AMAZING.
    Ah, it's so rare to find a good Gerard/Lindsey story, or one at all for that matter.
    This was absolutely fantastic.
    The description, the plot, the characters; everything.
    December 30th, 2008 at 09:35pm
  • chasingstars;

    chasingstars; (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    29
    Location:
    Canada
    D:
    Wow.
    Everything was just...perfect. Description, dialouge, atmosphere...yeah.

    [/there. a comment. happy?]
    December 28th, 2008 at 07:27am
  • Zakodia

    Zakodia (100)

    :
    Member
    Gender:
    Age:
    31
    Location:
    United States
    Awww, This was adorable as always.

    You have a way of making it so cute, it's almost unbearable.
    (In a good way of course)

    I demand OVER 9000 HEARTS FOR YOU!!! <3

    I think we know my favorite part of the story.

    RANDOM MATT!

    ....Yeah.....

    Random Poem!


    One more drink

    To save her from the brink

    A suprise greeting

    For an unexpected meeting

    The past left behind

    Still lurks outside the mind

    Love attracting danger

    A familar stranger

    Memories set down

    Future surrounds


    I think I'm a bit insane today. XD Smiley
    December 27th, 2008 at 09:42am