Rinse and Repeat. - Comments

Teenage Dirtbag.:

WHY DOES THIS NOT HAVE ANY COMMENTS? :cheese: I love your descriptions, they're so detailed and spot-on.

Step four: a metallic-esque taste fills your mouth. It tastes like a group of pennies, or sort of like that flavor that wraps around your tongue after you've licked a powerful battery.

Gaspy breaths; in and out, in and out, in and out, etc. Then the red is the only thing visible. The in and outs turn into a sporadic group of in’s, in’s, in’s, out’s, in’s, in’s, out’s, out’s, in’s, out’s, and in’s.

^ My favourite parts.

I like how you use the second person; it gives the whole thing a more mysterious air. And I also like how you don't tell us who the people are; it really draws the reader in.

:cute: Thank you so much! I'm really glad you liked it!

WHY DOES THIS NOT HAVE ANY COMMENTS? :cheese: I love your descriptions, they're so detailed and spot-on.

Step four: a metallic-esque taste fills your mouth. It tastes like a group of pennies, or sort of like that flavor that wraps around your tongue after you've licked a powerful battery.

Gaspy breaths; in and out, in and out, in and out, etc. Then the red is the only thing visible. The in and outs turn into a sporadic group of in’s, in’s, in’s, out’s, in’s, in’s, out’s, out’s, in’s, out’s, and in’s.

^ My favourite parts.

I like how you use the second person; it gives the whole thing a more mysterious air. And I also like how you don't tell us who the people are; it really draws the reader in.