Anyway, Take Care - Comments

Supermegafoxyawesome (100)

:: Member
Gender:: ♀
Age:: 30
Location:: United States

This is just amazing! Its must have been really fun to write because its so real. The character writing the letter just comes to life.

July 1st, 2009 at 06:13am

aubs (420)

:: Drabble Scribe
Gender:: ♀
Age:: 30
Location:: United States

All righty then. Well, I agree with everything deja entendu. said.

I didn't have a favorite line or part of the letter because the whole thing was fantastic. I loved the rambling of the letter because it made it more enjoyable to read.

I like every line of the letter was just as good as the rest. I just thought it was great and fantastic!

June 30th, 2009 at 10:05pm

let me go. (160)

:: Member
Gender:: ♀
Age:: 100
Location:: Antarctica

I actually really really enjoyed this. It was incredibly cute and well-written.

And I just loved the wordplay. Some of it was so clever and witty, like: Catalog for children toys that you don’t need, but like to look at. Oh, and the part about the fancy lettering and how the address wasn't left on the envelope so she wouldn't throw it away with the one from her mother.

The whole story was very upbeat. I actually did laugh at some of the lines. And I loved the rambling on and on and how awkward yet sharp and clever the person writing the letter acted at certain parts, like this: I really am the exact opposite of “a way with words”. I just have a way out of words. If that makes any sense to you, which is probably doesn’t (and, honey, that wasn’t an insult).
When I got to the part of "a part of me is missing" I was thinking that it was going to turn into a very cliche rest of the story, but you luckily didn't do that. So, that one line fits in nicely after all. Because you took a turn into another witty line with But not in the I’m-going-to-die-if-you-aren’t-always-by-my-side way.

I really liked the part where the writer got caught up thinking about Sofia. It was cute and light, and I laughed at the part where I got so caught up thinking about the time you fell off the swing out in my parent’s backyard.

remember the time when we lied on the concrete and tried to count the stars. I loved that. It's so sweet and pretty.

Okay, I only have two corrections for you:

If that makes any sense to you, which is probably doesn’t
Just a typo, that 'is' should be 'it'.

I should quit my job and get myself a descent outfit
That should be decent.

Great job, and good luck with the contest. :cute:

June 30th, 2009 at 08:47am