I like how you started the story out with telling of how the character’s family died from various illnesses, I felt like that gave a good intro the character and a good reason as to why they would have developed hypochondria. I was waiting to see how the person would do this disorder, I’m looking forward to reading more of your story.
I liked how in the end you did kill the character because they were trying to prevent dying. But I feel like you making the character so calm with dying when they were so scared of it before is a bit contradictory to the story and took something away from it. The story was very well done.
I did find one error in this sentence: In the back of my head were some small doubts, but those things were nothing compared to the feeling of not dyeing that way. Dyeing is spell incorrectly, it should be dying. But that was the only error I think I found in the story. Well done.
I liked how in the end you did kill the character because they were trying to prevent dying. But I feel like you making the character so calm with dying when they were so scared of it before is a bit contradictory to the story and took something away from it. The story was very well done.
I did find one error in this sentence:
In the back of my head were some small doubts, but those things were nothing compared to the feeling of not dyeing that way.
Dyeing is spell incorrectly, it should be dying. But that was the only error I think I found in the story. Well done.