The Approaching Curve - Comments

  • TottallyJO

    TottallyJO (100)

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    I love the poem in the begging. To be frank, I'm not too terribly thrilled,but that may be because i hate sappiness. Emotion was well played in the work. I think it would have been better if you elongate the story to incorporate scenes from select times,but i like how you incorparated past and present. A good one shot. overall I give this a 7 in style and a 5 in development. I still felt like i barely knew the characters at the end. A good short story though.
    January 30th, 2010 at 11:49pm
  • xiluvmusicx

    xiluvmusicx (110)

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    Very good. I'm impressed at how well you incorperated the picture. Great job.
    December 27th, 2009 at 06:01am