January 7th, 2010 at 02:39pm
So, I'm a little rusty on reading/commenting... hopefully I still have my touch = p
"Bri, I don't think you should be drinking any more. You've had plenty already," Zacky said as Brian began to pour himself the seventh glass of whiskey.
I'm pretty sure I'd fall off my chair if I heard Zacky suggest someone stop drinking... then again, kudos to him for looking out for his friends wellbeing :)
The description of the woman in question.. she sounds like an evil siren. Little Ms Heartbreaker... I don't like her already. hahaha.
On the outside, their relationship looked perfect. Inside, everything was near destruction but Brian remained hesitant to pull the trigger to end the suffering.
Beautifully written... this is why I love your work. Nice tie in with the song, not to mention it just has an awesome ring to it 'pull the trigger to end the suffering.' Two thumbs up!
Ah, Brian, Brian, Brian... listen to the voice of reason, no matter how nasal it can be at times... Mr. Baker is right. The whore is not worth it and it's not real love.. it's infatuation. Wake up, man!
Yeah, really hate this girl... but still mad at Brian. Although I'm excited that he followed her into the bathroom. I feel a confrontation coming on! :D
Brian walked closer to her, deciding to pull the trigger. He wasn't going to suffer under her wrath anymore.
Pull the trigger! Pull the trigger!
Of course she gets mean when she loses... has to say that he can't make it on his own. Bit full of yourself, love. He was fine before you, miserable with you and he'll be happy after you. :D
Manical laughter is so creepy... especially random manical laughter. haha. I'd be creeped out if I was Zacky... either that, or i'd be laughing at Brian.
Naww, poor Brian. He needs to find a decent girl, one that treats him with respect. I'm sure he wouldn't have too much trouble finding a girl like that.. so his life is on the up. haha.
Great story and I hope you win! :)
Sorry for the double post.