Oh no!!! Brian needs to watch his back!!! ehh. i'm not really worried tho. he can take mr. ex- loser-washed up-football player. lol. great update! more soon :)
Well done! I am thinking I'm ready to kick some football fuck ass tho!!!! Grrrrrrrr Lets have that update before I start killing off your characters on my mind.hehehehe
I've just come across this story after having a little look around for something new to read and I absolutely love it. The relationship between Zack and Brian is so realistic and Erin's character is just wonderfully sweet, although I figure she can hold her own if need be.
Fantastic so far, I really look forward to reading more :)
Ah, I love this so much! The way you've characterized the characters (i guess you could say that? xD) it's just so believable but you do it in your own way they're kind of like //your characters if you know what I mean... you give them actual personalities and make them your own, not just a typically 'all rockstars are wankers' cliche dross that is impossible to read.
I think you portray their crumbling relationship rather well. The dialogue is really believable. The summary holds just enough information, but it's bordering on giving away a little too much if you know what I mean. But it gives an insight to the story so it's up to you whether you want to do something with that.