Everything Leaves A Mark - Comments

I really like this. Like a lot.
But I agree a little bit with the people above -not that I can talk- I don't mean it in a harsh way though (:

It's an awesome story (:

I like this, but it feels a little condensed and rushed. Lovely story though! :)

First off this is loads better than some of your previous writing, not that i didn't like most of it. I loved the emoition and caracter building. The dialouge seems a little too fake to me towards the end. If she wouldn't say out right, you'll find another person or any of that stuff. Maybe add more time and more anger. Her mother convinced her he will leave her. She's going to be pissed either at her mom, self, or guy. just work that thorugh and you shall have one of your best pieces. I liked it about a 7.5. But that might be because it doesn't have vampires/werewolves/pixies/goths/or any of the magical sci fi family people. AGain i am TOTTALLY biased but yeah i liked it. It had a couple of typos so just reread it through and fix them. aka or supposed to be for and of should be if and all that.

-peace out- JO