If We Leave Love - Comments

Here from Le Comment Swap. Firstly I like the layout, slightly hard on my eyes, but I've seen worse. Secondly I like the picture and the title too.
Now to the actual story, this is something I've read too many times before. Quite a common plot, but still, you did it justice. Your descriptions are good, but I ant more of them! The relationship you created was nice, you made the way they interact very real, not as if it was forced or anything, if that makes sense. All in all, this was good. Nice job.

@ factory girl
you should create a pdf of these so I can ut them in my ibooks lol

@ factory girl
i kinda like how it ended but I also kinda don't like how it ended just because oli and indie broke up, but I just read the first chapter of returning love and you need to write more because im going crazy not being able to read the rest! Lol id buy this if it got published

@ grrRAWRx42
thanks that means a lot to me, do you like how it ended?
what do you think of there being a sequel?

this is my favorite story on mibba. ive been addicted since day one.

@ dizzydream
i have no motivation for this story im sorry but i am trying really hard to get it finished :)

Is this story on hiatus? I really love it. Please don't give up on it!

I love this story :D

This story is heading to a great direction so far! Update soon!

The summary was a bit bland and the layout is too dark, I have to strain my eyes just to see the letters adn it;s rather annoying. Other then that though i really like your story and the plot is really nice, I'm a fan of Bring Me The Horizon so was very happy when I got sent here through Comment Swap.

Keep writing and good luck

PLEASE UPDATEE!!!! LOVE IT<3 OLIVER SYKES IS MY IDOL TO BEGIN WITH

I found your summary to be a bit too long. Personally, I find stories more interesting when the summary leaves me guessing. I feel like you've summed up most of the story before it's even started.

However, you've got a good writing talent which is something you don't find very much any more.

Honestly, I have to say that I feel like the summary is a bit too cluttered and lengthy, but that's just personal preferences.

I enjoyed the relationships that you established between the main characters, and I really enjoyed reading the dialogue between them because you incorporated just the right amount of humor in their banter for it to feel natural, but not so much that it came across as random or unrealtistic.

As far as concrit goes, I would suggest avoiding giving away Indiana's entire background in the first couple of paragraphs because it feels like a little too-much-too-soon to me as a reader. I think it would be a lot more effective and intriguing if you showed more instead of flat-out telling everything so soon, if that makes any sense.

Anyways, I enjoyed reading this fic, and I wish you luck as you continue :)

I hope you really do continue this story.. I've been checking up on it for months !

Well i just finished what you have so far and i really like it its super interesting and i hope you continue soon. I love this story its super upper sweet and very well written with tons of descriptions... Your a great writer

Updateee sooon?(:

love this story!

lalalove this storyy

<3

This is getting really good!
Awesome job! :)

<3