This was great, though it's conclusion was a little... cliff-hanger-y. It was a tad confusing, and I wasn't sure what happened.
I love how you involved Tempe, seeing as how all my favorite music is from there.... Irrelevant...
So, no grammar or spelling jumped at me. I don't hunt through... So you're clear for that.
I do like how you used the line at the END. That's new for this contest, every other person used it as the opener and it was nice for a change of pace.
Again, I sincerley hope you excuse my awful outburst earlier and thank you for your entry. I'll start judging them against each other soon. :)
This was great, though it's conclusion was a little... cliff-hanger-y. It was a tad confusing, and I wasn't sure what happened.
I love how you involved Tempe, seeing as how all my favorite music is from there.... Irrelevant...
So, no grammar or spelling jumped at me. I don't hunt through... So you're clear for that.
I do like how you used the line at the END. That's new for this contest, every other person used it as the opener and it was nice for a change of pace.
Again, I sincerley hope you excuse my awful outburst earlier and thank you for your entry. I'll start judging them against each other soon. :)