Forever Connected - Comments

Good Start.

It's fun to see Patrick get jealous, and yay!!!! They are having a baby. I adore Sharpie and love thinking of him as a dad. Not sure the jealousy thing is going away anytime soon though. I guess we'll see.

Hasn't anyone learned that you give kids sugar and they get hyper. Maybe ice cream was a bad idea. LOL

YES GO HAWKS! ^^ this is a really well written chapter, you should be very pleased. Some of the paragraphs seem a little long, but that's really the only thing i could point out on what to make better, your dialogue is snappy and all in all it was a real pleasure to read. Keep up the awesome work and i'll look forward to your next chapter ^^