That was incredibly adorable! It was a tad bit cheesy, but it was just enough. I liked how a whole story was told in only one chapter. Your writing style is very good, but you need to work on your writing structure. Make sure to put a whole line between paragraphs, and always start a new paragraph when someone new starts talking. Other than that, this piece was pretty good!
Your score (out of ten): Use of picture: 9.0 Plot: 9.3 Writing: 8.8
This gives you a grand total of: 27.1 out of 30!
Great job! Good luck against the other participants!
That was incredibly adorable! It was a tad bit cheesy, but it was just enough. I liked how a whole story was told in only one chapter. Your writing style is very good, but you need to work on your writing structure. Make sure to put a whole line between paragraphs, and always start a new paragraph when someone new starts talking. Other than that, this piece was pretty good!
Your score (out of ten):
Use of picture: 9.0
Plot: 9.3
Writing: 8.8
This gives you a grand total of:
27.1 out of 30!
Great job! Good luck against the other participants!