All the Way Home - Comments

: ) Amazing. It reminds me of Brokeback Mountain.

At this story totally hit the right bit of my current mood. My Liptov self got happy (hih, weird to write this in English, especially since the story is set in obviously Slovak mountains and they are Slovak and they eat bryndza and such, but because the story is in English, I will comment in English too).

I agree with whoever said that it's obvious that you love the mountains from the way you described it. The whole story radiates the kind of familiar, loving thing that you put there. It feels as if you love these characters a little more than your other characters, as if you handled them with more care and love - if that makes any sense. I'm not sure it does. But I hope you know what I mean.

Your descriptions were more guiding my imagination, than really creating anything - maybe because I'm painfully familiar with the mountains around my grandma and I see them immediately, without trying. I also like how you added the Slovak bits here and there, it makes us sound almost exotic. Interesting, really interesting for me. It's like reading about things you find painfully familiar and suddenly rediscovering their uniqueness.

I didn't like the ending all that much, I have to say. It felt a tiny bit rushed, but it wasn't really that, I... I wanted more details about what happened afterwards, I wanted to know. I also wanted to slap them both, silly boys.

Overally, though, great job. As always.

PS: The whole country and nature vs, city makes me think of Švantner. Not so shocking, eh?

This was seriously, ans honestly, amazing.
My mind is completely blown, and I am just breathless. Speechless, even.
This story was beautiful, heartbreaking, honest, and real.
I just can't get over how talented you are.

I know as a judge I'm supposed to point out things that I didn't like about your entry,
but I honestly can't do that with this one.
Your writing style is truly unique, and you have an incredible voice for story telling.
The plot line was completely original, and very believeable.
The characters were easy to relate to and understand,
and you conveyed their emotions vividly and perfectly.

I really liked how the tattoos decorating Peter's skin seemed to symbolize
the way the world had touched him and changed him.
It was a good technique.

I really liked this line:
"Peter’s blood was hot. He liked to be the hunter, and the harder his prey was to catch, the stronger he’d become. He craved for unstoppable chasing of weak birds and city lights. As early as a kid he was the one who’d chase and catch; Jakub was just the quiet, marveled observer."

Your way of characterizing is just spectacular, really.

I also have to say that the sexual encounter between Jakub and Peter was just beautiful.
You wrote it so tastefully, and everything flowed.
I liked how it was full of turmoil and conflict.
It was just so realistic,
and I enjoyed how the reader could understand how each man truly felt.
It was fantastic.

You definitely used your secret well within this. (:

I loved this story very much, and there are so many things I could tell you,
but I'm just going to leave you with this is amazing.
Well done, and you have talent.
<3

Thank you so much for submitting in time,
and good luck!

I GOT IT I GOT IT.
This was....
Spine-tingling, awe-inspiring, astoundingly, electrifying.
Courtesy of Dictionary.com

Thank you so much for joining the contest and submitting your entry on time!

This was... absolutely superb, unique, and amazing. You honestly have left me speechless because this entry blew my mind. It was so descriptive and pure and we could literally feel Jakub and Peter's pain. Your attention to detail is an amazing trait that not only I, but a lot of others probably envy. The way you tell a story astounds me. I love how you decided to place the story in an area that is close to your heart, and you could tell it meant a lot to you. I also love how we could practically imagine that we were there with them, but you didn't take the traditional route of describing their surroundings, but personifying them. Amazing job with that. The entire entry flowed swiftly and easily, as if it were completely natural, and I couldn't tear my eyes away from it.

The scene where Peter realized that he truly loved Jakub and had loved him for a while was so powerful. You could tell that Jakub even knew their bond was strong and special, but it was just too late for them. You could literally feel the regret Peter had at leaving, because if he stayed he may have been able to have his Jakun, or he'd at least know that he had loved him sooner.

The sexual scene was very well written, focusing more on their emotions, worries, and how they cared so deeply for each other then the actual actions they were carrying out, making it obvious what they were doing though. It seemed like it was heat of the moment, and Peter so greatly wanted to get lost in that moment.

City is a beast of prey. It's such a simple line, but it's not only true, it sets the tone for a good amount of the story. Once you put that line in there, you focused on how Peter had changed and how he had been taken prisoner by the flashing lights, forgetting the boy he once was and missing the opportunity to be with the man he will always love more than anything else in the world. I don't know why that simple line stuck out for me, but it truly set the tone for the rest of the story and you did it so imaginatively too.

You could tell that the secret was meant for both boys, though they realized it at different times, yet they did nothing to stay together, choosing to be apart because they were no longer their original selves. They loved their childhood selves, not the men they grew to be, so in a sense, at least in my opinion, I felt like they not only can't live without each other, but the memories of their pasts and who they once were as well.

Overall amazing entry. My mind is officially blown. Keep up the amazing work because you truly are an amazing and talented writer. (:

GAHH.
Why do you have to be so damn good at writing?
Holy shit.
This was amazing.
Like.
I don't even...
I'm speechless.
Nghh... I....
-Subscribes-
If I think of something, then I'll come back and comment again. xD
-Rereads-