October 27th, 2010 at 09:26pm
Best lines:
What had they done? Had this just happened? Where were they? What year was it? Who were they? Was this real? Had they died and gone to Heaven?
and
"...if I had to change why the fuck couldn’t you change? Why’d you get to stay the same?”
“You really think I was going to give up the last tie I had to you?”
Why didn't you tell me about this? I even got a ded how dare you keep this from me <3__<3
Though to be quite frank, as I was reading, it didn't feel like your best work. It wasn't. I think you wrote it in the spur of the moment and was just so compelled by the circumstances that it all came toppling out and frankly I'm jealous of how quickly it comes to you. Two thousand words of emotion, and it actually said something - so stylistically speaking there were flaws, and some wording was awkward, but I wouldn't want you to change it. Because in reality we don't always say the things that flow along to the narration to our heads, and something can be flawed but we love it anyway. It's the weird thing that makes this perfect, Dru. It depicted some kind of hope and emotion in that moment that if you even edited it a little bit it wouldn't be so clear anymore. I could actually read this better, not just as a story but a piece of writing with trapped little feelings inside it. I hope you got what I'm saying xD
Tl;dr I really liked this :) It satisfied my weird and quiet Ryden fantasies.