Is He Mad? - Comments

I too adore this concept. Like mia san mia. said, your idea is completely different to anything I've read recently and that makes me really excited for what is to come in this. Your summary drew me right in, so really good job on that.

Your writing style itself is really captivating, it's probably what I like most about this piece. Your description is really simple, but it describes so much more than if you were to use really flowery language. The constant flow of thought from Neek is really easy to read and I do love how much of his character comes across in the way that he tells us about the hell he is being subjected to. I found his reaction to Alik's death the most interesting of all though. He seems to simply shrug it off which tells more about the pit than a thousand words could. Amazing.

The idea for the story itself,like I said above, is really unique. I'm totally into the whole POW-esque stories and that is exactly what this reminds me of. The fact that you hint at the police being corrupt and Neek being innocent is even better.

I feel for Neek, I really do. You've made a brilliant start and I really do adore your writing style. I'll definitely be keeping up with this one to see what happens next!

I just have to say that I adore your concept and how different it is. Right off the bat, your summary is very captivating with the idea of the police being corrupt and the guilty ones being innocent actually. It's a great concept and I love that it starts with they said he died that day because I'm instantly wondering who he is and what he was doing that ultimately got him killed.

I keep imagining this hole, this pit you describe as somewhere in Siberia for some reason. I think it might be that you mention it's cold and your banner image, or that Alik is Romanian, but I keep thinking of it as like some sort of Gulag type camp in a remote part of the wilderness where they exile criminals not be killed, just slowly die on their own. A place not even full of criminals, just the undesirables of society, sent for whatever lies they could conjure up to justify it. Even if that's not what you're imagining, it really enhances my vision of this place and the cruelty of not just the environment, but the people who put the men here.

I'm entranced by your writing style. I love the simplicity of it and the straightforwardness of Neek's narration. His desolate honesty is what I find most enjoyable about this so far. His indifference to life and death just tells me how broken he is by this place and that is seems to have turned the people into savages, like Roland's men.

This is definitely a great start so far and I'm very interested to see where you take it. Two chapters in and I'm already invested in the survival of Neek, although I do have a feeling that nobody survives this place just based on what happened to Alik and the nameless men he describes, like the one in the burrow and the one with the mittens. I see a lot of potential for this. Keep up the great work!