This is the last time I'll fall. Fall for you. - Comments

  • Walking.Oxymoron

    Walking.Oxymoron (200)

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    Very nice for your first story.

    A month is a little too short of a dating time. This might just be my personal opinion getting in the way.. Also, I would have liked a little more back story on Darren and Erika's relationship, like how long they've known each other etc. The scene breaks was a nice way of dividing it up, though some places you could of written a paragraph transition.

    I particularly enjoyed the ending (the last paragraph).
    October 22nd, 2010 at 06:56am