Sorry that this comment is arriving so late. I am still going to pick a winner for my contest.
You are definitely right when nobody addresses cutting seriously anymore. And I like the approach that you took with this story.
I was definitely not expecting the ending. It was totally out of the blue. And I like the fact that you turned the character into a legend whose story lives on. That was a nice touch. I also really loved the hooks that you added to the end of your chapters. It kept me hooked. I couldn't stop reading.
Your characters both definitely have spunk, kid. I enjoy that they are not emotionless girls who are afraid of everything. One is a murderer, and the other can be extremely accusing. Which helps to point out that everybody has their issues.
You also did an amazing job at depicting what a friend of a cutter might feel. Heather seems like she is in denial that her friend could do something like that. And the only thing that she can bring herself to do is to confront her friend, because she is worried. It's a classic attempt that friends do to get their friends to stop cutting. You showed that really well. You were also able to bring in Heather's worry throughout the story.
I love your fool me once, fool me twice, fool me three times lines in chapter four. I thought they were a very nice touch.
I did notice a couple of spelling and punctuation errors, though. Just a couple, no worries!
Favorite Quotes: “She was so strong but look under her sleeves and you’d find a different story.” “...her tall body fell like a large oak.” “She bit into her lip. They were chapped and her cheekbones were ready to burst free out of her skin. Her boney fingers twirled together. She was a living skeleton and it was my entire fault.”
You are definitely right when nobody addresses cutting seriously anymore. And I like the approach that you took with this story.
I was definitely not expecting the ending. It was totally out of the blue. And I like the fact that you turned the character into a legend whose story lives on. That was a nice touch. I also really loved the hooks that you added to the end of your chapters. It kept me hooked. I couldn't stop reading.
Your characters both definitely have spunk, kid. I enjoy that they are not emotionless girls who are afraid of everything. One is a murderer, and the other can be extremely accusing. Which helps to point out that everybody has their issues.
You also did an amazing job at depicting what a friend of a cutter might feel. Heather seems like she is in denial that her friend could do something like that. And the only thing that she can bring herself to do is to confront her friend, because she is worried. It's a classic attempt that friends do to get their friends to stop cutting. You showed that really well. You were also able to bring in Heather's worry throughout the story.
I love your fool me once, fool me twice, fool me three times lines in chapter four. I thought they were a very nice touch.
I did notice a couple of spelling and punctuation errors, though. Just a couple, no worries!
Favorite Quotes:
“She was so strong but look under her sleeves and you’d find a different story.”
“...her tall body fell like a large oak.”
“She bit into her lip. They were chapped and her cheekbones were ready to burst free out of her skin. Her boney fingers twirled together. She was a living skeleton and it was my entire fault.”