February 6th, 2011 at 07:22pm
Story Review Game: I'm reviewing this and its sequel, since it makes a bit more sense to me that way. Not that it can't stand alone, but you made a story that I wanted to read.
I love the description, how it's simple and interesting and it pulls a lot from Kendall's past. The description of the father is very similar to a friend of mine's dad, and to be honest, he really pisses me off. Not a cool guy, y'know?
The fact that he fell into the leaves, and then just couldn't remember what should have made him upset in exchange for something rather peaceful makes me smile a bit. I'm glad that, even though it's a bad memory, he seems to not have all the bad in it. His older brother-ness with Katie is absolutely adorable and sort of how my brother is with me when my parents fight. Our rooms are across the hall from one another, and when they fight we open our doors and just kind of look at each other. It's sort of comforting, and it's something I can easily relate to within the story.
The description with how they were changing, likening it to snakeskin, was a brilliant line- it really sticks out and sort of calls for your attention. From there, how it switches topics to a new sport for a new town it brilliant and calm and it just flows. As a matter of fact, the entire story just flows like it's something that's far more then just a oneshot with a sequel.
I'm assuming that this is Big Time Rush era Kendall due to his mentioning of performing, which sets the stage wonderfully for the next installment. Though I know it's not going to be a happy one, at least one of the two things he was content with is working out, yanno?
and it does give off a feel for wind, especially with the leaves changing
a Kendall one <3 that's sorta why I clicked on it x)
plus it was the one with one of the cooler story titles haha
I lke how ths is a Jo/Kendall romance and not an OC/Kendall one
I hardly see anybody write stories with the characters already on the show/book/movie
I didn't know his father left him :( poor guy, that has to be hard
I really dont like parents who push their dreams on their kids
it's like they're trying to relive their glory days by putting it on their children
ahh parents fighting, I hate that. It's just so ugh. and it sucks because you can't do anything about it
I like the way you explained he got into hockey. you did a good job getting a history in on that,
and it fits realy well with the show, it's something that would really happen
this ws a cute one shot, and I liked it :)