Just Breathe - Comments

This seemed really realistic to me, because it was something that many of us need to do. To be calm, because we all have our own stress in our own lives. And like many of the readers above me have stated, it was very calm and a nice read. Good job c;

This reminds me of yoga, cause that is what yoga does for the mind; it relaxes you until all you focus on is the stretch of your body & your breathing. Very soothing.

This is very calming.

I love on how you took something simple - like breathing - and turned it into something beautiful.
Very clever. Well done! (:

It was kinda like being in a meditation room, so that was quite cool. It was like soothing but still had the creepy undertones so it worked really good together. But ya, you really good with drabbles. Seriously.

Incredibly calming. It's clear that a lot of thought went into writing this. I liked the way the whole process you're describing works in a cycle. As in, we are breathing and becoming breath and are breathed. This was very clever. Well done!

Like pandas! said above me, I do agree that this is very poetic and it can make you think. The words you used were, I would say, clever ones to use. I especially loved the first 3 paragraphs, where the first words were in italics, and I thought that was effective.

I just thought you could've used a better layout. It seemed like the background was just planted on there at any random place. Also, the story content's background and the text don't quite match and it was a little hard for me to read. Maybe the text could be lighter? :D

Other than that, this was a great drabble. Well done! :3

besides the fact that the layout was hard for me to read but that may be because i don't have very good eyesight... any who

It's so poetic it was calming i've never thought like that actually so it was nice. calming soothing I read it while my little brother sat beside me & he said it was nice you know how hard it is for him to say a story is nice? he's more for poetry so maybe that's it.

keep outshining yourself dear!

The layout is a bit hard to read. D: I had to highlight the words to read them, which I usually do anyway. The way this was written was beautiful, I loved the detail and the emense emotion coming from every word. This is proof enough you have talent, good work.

The layout; when I was reading I found myself highlighting the text because my eyesight was straining (sorry I have to be honest). I wear glass anyway so, it may be different for others.

The story was quite inspiring and motivating actually, it was very calming as I read it. It was beautiful actually!

The layout is a bit iffy, I won't lie. Maybe you can get a gray background and put that instead of the picture. It's distracting somehow :/ Anyways, I really love all of your drabbles. They're all truly masterpieces. I like how they're raw and real and they get you in touch with every single emotion that you have - be it sadness, sympathy or calm. You really have a knack for that :D This one was especially my favorite; it's so calming and pretty. It's sort of like that bit of euphoria that everyone is looking for time to time. It reminds me of that one song Breathe (2AM), how pretty and nice it is. The concept is lovely and simple. It's absolutely perfect, in my opinion (:
Lovely job, hun! <3

The layout is a bit iffy, but the content, the actual content was BRILLIANT.
I loved the calmness of the story.
The concept is so simple, and that's what I love about it!

Content wise, this is definitely one of my favorite stories ever!

This is so...calming and amazing!
Awesome job!

I can only say one thing:

Wow.

That made me feel real...I dunno. Dreamy and loose. I can't explain it. You're a good writer. That was so beautiful, like a poem. I didn't find any spelling or grammatical errors. Good job! Brava! Brava!

I really, really enjoyed reading this. It made me feel kind of mellow, you know? Like Jell-O. :'D. The wording was nice and airy, just like breath - or breathing, hehe - and it just added to the nice feeling you already had going. The layout was nice, but I'm not sure I liked it all too much. It was readable, and nicely matched, but it was a touch tooo dark for the message, I think. But don't worry, others may find the dark calming. Anyways, that doesn't really matter all too much, hehe, this piece was amazing. :D Like, incredible, for shizzle.<3

I really, really enjoyed reading this and I do believe I could spend the day just relaxing now, hehe. :)<3

It was very soothing and your choice of wording was lovely. The layout wasn't very appealing, however. Maybe make it less dark and color clashing (owch!) and resize the pic in the background and put it in the story area under the title? (': There was a few grammar mistakes here and there but nothing too major. Overall, you did a nice job. <3

Okay, so as I was reading this, I found that I was really concentrating on breathing. Although just in words, this felt very peaceful, almost like this was a yoga session :) I'd have to say that this: Focus on the sweet pull of oxygen part from the beginning was my favorite.

The only thing I would have to critique on was the layout. I agree with Isadora Pierce on this, the layout made it harder to read.

Nonetheless, this was very good, and everyone should read it just to get that calm sense in their mind.

I thought that this was really interesting read. There was no real, concrete story, it was like we could create any situation we wanted and you had simply just given us the short aftermath. It was weird, because there were so many times where you said 'just breathe' or whatever and I actually found myself sitting there, inhaling and exhaling the way I would have to in order to relax after something stressful or painful.

I read this on my iPod, but for me, there was one part where you had a new line and there was no space and it would look much cleaner if you put a space between the lines. Also, there was a line where you had only written 'you' when it should have been 'you are'. I'd copy and paste it for you, but like I said, I'm on my iPod and I don't really know how.

But all in all, this was very good.

I have no clue why but I really love these lines:
"Breathe. Just breathe. Focus on the sweet pull of oxygen from your surroundings while forgetting those surroundings"
and
"You swim among their lungs"

You have an interesting and intriguing writing style.

I felt oddly at ease while reading this, and I'm really glad I did. I've been stressing out over final exams and such so this was a great way to relax my mind. I felt like they were yoga instructions which was cool :)

Breathe, and you can watch your hands move without being conscious of the acts they're performing.
I do this sometimes actually, haha. It makes me feel weird knowing that I alone can control my own movements and actions and I can essentially do whatever I want with my hands without really thinking too deeply about it [/random]

Deny the pain you felt, the embarrassment you suffered, the evil you created.
I'm curious about that last part. I wonder what the evil is? Maybe something in our own lives? It's not a bad thing - I'm just thinking aloud :)

This was great to read! Only thing I would fix is the layout - with the dark background and dark text it can be difficult to read. I'd suggest either making the text lighter (maybe white?) or maybe the background lighter. Other than that, I loved this :)

I absolutely love the concept of this. I adore it. I love every word you wrote. The detail that you gave was good, and the sort of emotion I felt was amazing.

Although, I didn't like the layout. :/