Just Breathe - Comments

Ooooh! I really like it!! I wasn't quite sure what to think just based on the description, but the words you wrote were actually really inspiring. The only thing I would change is the layout, like if you took the picture out from behind the story just because it made it kind of hard to read. The words themselves though were really good - you're a great writer!

This was really calming to read, but it was actually hard to focus on because the layout is absolutely...I don't know the word for it, but it hurt my eyes really badly and I had to strain to read it all. Also, I don't think you should have had "forgot". It should be forget. Forget this, forget that. Not, forgot this, forgot that. It just doesn't go with the rest of your tense.

But as for the rest of it, like I said before, it was calming and really relaxing. I think it could be used as some kind of zen, yoga thing, if you really wanted it to. Your writing flows in present tense, and I like that.