Life As I Know It - Comments

Comment swap ;

Great beginning, I love the way the story captures the readers attention it just shows that your story is really well written I think your characters are interesting and I do hope you keep writing I'll look forward to reading more your layout looks neat and everything falls in place well so that's a good thing anyways great job and keep it up.

Comment swap here!
The first sentence definitely draws the reader in. I really love the names chosen, and definitely can't wait to learn more about the world Artemis is moving into. I'll be honest, the idea of a human having to choose between supernatural creatures is a little cliche, but you write well enough that it doesn't feel like a cliche. Just be careful that this doesn't turn into a complete Mary Sue adventure. That being said, Artemis seems interesting and I really like this so far!

This was a pretty good read. I noticed a few mistakes here and there, but the were nothing major and didn't set me off from the story. I really like Artemis. She seems interesting, and her interactions with her friends seem really genuine and relatable. You have really good descriptions and I loved your dialogue. Good job!

This was an interesting read. Grammar-wise, I found no mistake whatsoever and it's really well-written, which is always a plus for me when reading and commenting on stories.

The flow is very consistent and I really liked the first-person narration, something that I do not like quite often but it fitted perfectly with it.

Your descriptions are good they convey the perfect amount of emotion and give the reader enough to work with; however, I was left missing more details, but they mainly have to do with the back story behind all of this (are you planning on continuing it?)

The dialogues didn't seem forced at all and where quite easy to read; again, I wish it had more of an interaction with the past as to who is each character, this to help me picture them and develop them properly.

The ending was something I was not expecting, so extra points for the twist. I, however, felt that it all happened too suddenly. I thought the ceremony was, at first, to crown her or something; then to turn her into another being so she wouldn't be human, and then it turns out to be a soul mate search kind of thing; it confused me a tad bit, but then I pieced the things together. Maybe working it out since the beginning as to what the ceremony is about would help ease the sudden transition.

Aside from that, I enjoyed the story. It was very well written and entertaining.

Hello! So comment swapper brought me here and I'm very happy it did. Just as the previous comment said, this story was very interesting. I loved the imagery that you gave the readers and you writing style is very, very good. Your words flowed very nicely and made the story easy to read. I also love the overall concept of this story; how you wrote about an old topic but made it very original, unique and something that has never been written. If you were to turn this one-shot into a story, I would definitely subscribe. :) Please keep writing because you have talent!

Well, that was interesting :) I especially love the idea of soulmates. In fact, I'm rather obsessed with it at the moment, so that definitely helped maintaining my interest throughout reading this, waiting for the special moment to hit. That and the fact that you write very well, and have a consistent flow of storytelling; a smooth unraveling and procession none too fast or slow. Great job overall, so far. Only thing I would suggest, though, is more detail/description on the more important parts. You know, the whole 'show, don't tell's bit. And that's pretty much it. :) I'm subscribing.

I really liked this, I read it and I laughed and I rooted and I thought this was a really cool idea. I encourage you to continue writing this because I would like to know what happens to Artemis and all of the kings. It was a really awesome idea, I just wish I thought of it first xD You beat me to it, of course, so I'll tune in for your lovely and beautiful writing and hope you did write more. :3

I really enjoyed this, it has wonderful flow to it and Artemis is a great character. The way she looks at life is unique. You have a fantastic ratio of dialogue to description and you draw the reader in, especially at the ending, I really want to know how on earth she could cope with four husbands!

The writing is spot on. It all flows really, really well. In fact, I'd only went into this story planning on just taking a glance at it, then read it/comment later, but I got completely sucked in! Before I knew it I had it all read and I was like, 'D:' when I saw that you don't have any of the sequel post yet, heh.

I enjoy the unique names, and how every character manages to shine in the own way right of the bat, and be realistic about it too.

I found myself wondering what happened to Artemis further than the details in the story. The back story itself seems like it could make a wonderful novel, like before she got to the palace and whatnot and what brought her to that point. If that makes sense, hahah.

The point above was just a random suggestion, and it does not at all affect this actual story, it was just an idea for a prequel if you needed it :) Like I said I'm in love with it, and it has so much potential. I'm stoked to see where you take Artemis, her sister, friends, and all of her could-be husbands! LOL.

It's just great, long story short. You've got the perfect set up for a full-length story and I really hope you continue with it!