Florence O'Brian and the Boy Who Lived - Comments

  • Malfoy

    Malfoy (100)

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    Agh! Thank you, Arms it's all fixed now. I can't catch all of my errors tehe
    July 5th, 2012 at 05:38am
  • chasingstardust

    chasingstardust (100)

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    On this line: "Even so, that is non of your business Florence!..."
    non should be none and I am pretty sure there should be a comma before Florence.
    That was the main thing that distracted me a bit from the story.
    I will let you know if I find anything else (:
    July 4th, 2012 at 04:37pm
  • Malfoy

    Malfoy (100)

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    Thank you so much, do you remember where my mistakes were so I can go correct them? Again, thanks for the comment. I'm cheesing like a fool right now Cute
    July 4th, 2012 at 06:40am
  • chasingstardust

    chasingstardust (100)

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    For all the Harry Potter fanfics that I've read, this is an extremely good one. I like how you write. It is very descriptive without going overboard. I noticed a few grammar and spelling issues, but they were subtle and didn't get in the way of the story. You did a great job characterizing Florence. I am looking forward to seeing where this goes, so I am subscribing. (:
    July 4th, 2012 at 06:37am