What Happen To Goodbye - Comments

When I was reading this I noticed a number of minor grammar issues but those aren't a problem. I really liked how you spaced this one shot, I'm not a fan of Ke$ha but you worked very well with the lyrics. This story almost brought tears to my eyes because it's the story of my life right now, almost, except for some time differences and the fact that he isn't with some other girl still. I don't want he and I to say goodbye but there's not much I can do. I enjoyed reading this because I can relate to it. You know how to put emotion into your words and made me feel it, even if I wasn't going through the same thing, I would have felt it in your story. Great job!

Let me give you a heads up on mistakes first before I get into anything else. I saw a few with your/you're, a few commas needed here and there, small mistakes like that. Easy fixes if read aloud. :)

I'm with rapunzel;, the song lyrics written in with the paragraph really worked out nicely. You molded the song into something more than the average listener would get from the song, and that is what makes a songfic special. :D

Awesome one-shot. :3

Something I really liked about this one-shot was that you wrote in a paragraph for every few lines of lyrics. In other words, I loved how you wove the lyrics into the whole story. I wish I could have seen more background on what happened to the two people even if you made it up. I was a little interesting why she left.

The only thing I had a problem with was the color of the content. I thought it was a little bit too dark against the black background; it made the content a little hard to read.

Overall, this was a really well written one-shot. It was probably the best song fic I have read so far.

The layout was good, but I feel like the story leaned a bit to heavily on the song. When you do song fics its better to not make the title the name of the song. You're a good writer, though, and I really like some of the phrasing you used. My advice is just to find a style all your own, and works for you and run with it. :)

Honestly, I've never been a big fan of song-fics or ke$ha. But you actually did a really good job with tying in the lyrics to a base. Although I think it would have been fine with out the lyrics, it still bad a good background explanation. And for some reason, Goodbye For Now by P.O.D kept popping into my head. 0.o

Sweet job for a one shot. Nothing more painful than a heartbreak.

(Sorry for any spellig errors or grammar mistakes up there. I'm typing from my iPod.)