The Things You Leave Behind - Comments

please update soon :)

Loving this story :)
Can't wait to read more

To begin, the layout is very, very pretty. The colors all work nicely together, and the banner fits well with (what I think) the story is going to be about. On the banner, I also like the addition of a quote "Everyone does something they're not proud of." I'm wondering what your characters did then. Hmm... Anyway, the summary was another good quote, one I'd heard numerous times but a nice quote none-the-less. Greek Mythology is my favorite :) Haha! <3

Onto the first chapter (in french! oui oui! <3):

That is so sad :( I feel horrible for that girl, who lost her sister but her parents are, in her eyes, blaming her. Further, I'm curious about the death of her sister; was she an inexperienced driver? Or drunk? I'm betting money she was drunk, just because I can't see them blaming her for any other reason. But blaming her is wrong! She's grieving too! Though, they aren't actually blaming her for it..

There were no mistakes that I could catch, which was nice and I liked your use of descriptions for their mourning. I'm definitely going to be checking back on this later, it sounds like an interesting story :D

Happy writing <3

I love the layout. Seriously. It's pretty and shows nice emotion. I wonder who the love interest will be, and how the accident ties in. Because I assume, from the summary, this will be a romance. It intrigues me so. I'll definitely be reading on, girl!

I like the way you explained the car crash. It was very beautiful and poetic. "...the earth shifted and shattered, moved too quickly past my eyes and then it was still and black and splattered with red." Just, gah! <3 I loved that especially. :'D You are such a magnificent writer. I wonder if this will make me cry...? Hopefully not. x)

Also, j'adore your layout. :3

Hi. My name's Lulu and I like your story.

That being said, you might want to better proof-read or get a beta. I'm being slightly dramatic, because it's not like you made super, horrible mistakes. Just like a few times when you'd write 'though' instead of 'thought', 'sole' instead of 'soul', or 'soar' instead of 'sore'. I feel like a grammar nazi. It's not even a big deal.

Moving on. Holy cow, way to make the beautiful sunny day outside seem miserable. I almost feel like my sister died. :( The weird thing is, that was a compliment! Making me depressed was good--well, not good, but you know what I mean--because your writing is so personal and hits home. I know what it's like to lose someone and be surrounded by all of that and it makes me want to cry.

I'm proud of you. All of what I said might possibly seem bad but it was my appreciation. I'm not even finished reading what you updated! I just had to comment before I forgot all the thoughts clawing their way through my brain.

Next issue. No--issue is the wrong word. Next point of praise. I have a very thick skull and it takes a some real good imagery to move me and make me see. Girly, it's a movie inside my head. You and wilde. I love you both. (I hope you like that I compared you to her, since I know we're both big fans of hers C:)

You are Emily the spider spinning a web of enticing fiction and I am merely a fly you've captured with rapt attention.

Was that a weird metaphor?

Well, that's my comment. I've done my part--but believe me when I say I will be back for more. I hope that that all made sense, considering I'm typing very fast because I want to go back to your story!

Okay, I admit I stalk and read all of your current, unfinished stories you have going on. Skipping A Beat, Somewhere You Are, American Royalty and now this. Your writing literally blows me away, dude. I AM FREAKING JEALOUS. WHY OH WHY CAN'T I HAVE BEEN BLESSED WITH YOUR WRITING SKILLS?

... I had one single crazy moment where I pretended that he wanted me to drag him to the bed that was a few feet away and do with him whatever you could get done in sixteen minutes. OOH. Reagan is beginning to have inappropriate thoughts about Tate, I see ;) Haha, I really like Tate, he sounds hot, mysterious, secretive and yet awkward all wrapped up in one marvellous package, I love how him and Reagan interact, it's really realistic and you can just totally see the initial awkwardness between those two ebbing away the more they speak :D Great job, update soon <33

“We though, since Natalie was gone now, we would come and take her stuff, to remind us of her.” Was though suppose to be thought?

I love the layout it is very elegant and beautiful.
I love the way you describe things and such,I wish I could write like you. I love your choice of words and your imagery is amazing. I am going to keep reading on.

First of all, THANKS FOR THE GIF. xD Second, I already love this and am wishing that I could give you a boss gif as well, but I don't want to mess up, so yeah >.> Oh, and the layout is gawjus :3 ONTO THE ACTUAL REVIEW.

Chapter 1: We cried a lot the week after the incident. SAD STORY D: Waah, that already makes me sad. </3 I absolutely love how you describe this family's grief after this accident and this girl's sister's death. I can feel like I'm sitting there, crying with them. Your writing really brings the reader into the story, which I absolutely love :3 You've definitely got my hooked with this amazing, amazing masterpiece and I'm excited to read on <3 Oh, and didn't you get the memo? Cliche is awesome again! xD

Chapter 2: Your openings - and everything else about this story, as a matter of fact - are absolutely... dfkjdslkjlsadkgjlksadjglkdsjglksjdgklsjagklj. Yeah, that. I have no words to describe them. Wait, yeah, I do. BEAUTIFUL. Now, this totally reminds me of the beginning of The Luxe series, where the younger sister is watching the funeral of her older sister. Anyways, like I said, you describe everything so marvelously and your details are perfect, even when you describe how Natalie was found by the police and even how this boy that she fancied looks. I'm...speechless.

Okay, this is amazing. Truly and utterly amazing. I'm in love with this already. I'll come back to read more when I can, but I'm subbing for now. I'm excited to find out what happens to Regan and her family <3

Oh, and *gif of that surprised kitty* xD

I click this and I'm like "YAY EXCITED TO READ SOME STORY, ALRIGHT LET'S DO THIS" and I'm pumped, and I read the little quote. I'm like aw, so cute, what a cute layout. This is so adorable. Let's go read the first chapter. Aw yeah, reading the fi-

WHAT. That's so sad. I was just like, my heart breaking the entire time I was reading it. I mean, I know some people got some problems but when you're pretty sure you killed your own sister, well, that can take a toll on you. It's true what you said about parents though, I don't know it just always seems like they're the example and it must be so hard on her. Especially if she feels like her parents blame her with their eyes.

It's just so... horrible! And sad! D:

dressed in an outfit she wouldn’t normally have been caught dead in.
... I saw what you did there.

You can really tell that she thought a lot of her though, and they were close, just by little hints and I like that. You don't outright say "SO WE WERE BESTIES" but you imply it with how much she knows. Like Natalie would have thought this and did that and this was what Natalie was like and that smile of hers. And how she thought so highly of her, sort of invincible, and how hard it must be to see not only someone so strong but her sister dead. It's just so heartbreaking.
D:

And then I love it when someone's actually close with their parents in any sort of way in stories, it's so boring to see I hate my parents over and over again. BUT THIS JUST MAKES ME SAD.

Tate seems super interesting though, a little bit of a lost cause but I'm a sucker for those types. He's got this honesty to him, like he's not really hiding the bad parts of him, that I really like and find refreshing almost. He seems like a really interesting character and I'm definitely looking out for more of him. Their conversation was sad though.

EVERYTHING IS SO SAD.

The ending especially, how even though she's sort of stuck in this rut the entire world keeps on going and even though Natalie's dead and it seems impossible the world doesn't seem to care much and just keeps spinning like nothing ever happened. And everything sad and not happy and heartbreaking and not cool.

...



I am definitely going to read the rest of this when it's not 10:30 at night and I'm super tired. Seriously. I'm sort of in love with this.
JUST SAYING.

When I read the summary, I thought "Oh! A story about finding your soul mate! Awesome!". Then k read the first chapter and I was confused as to where this story was going. Is there more about her sister later on? Is she going to fall in love?

I love how you leave me with questions that have yet to be answered.

Your description of emotion is amazing and I felt as if I were the main character. I can't imagine how difficult it is to have parents blaming you of a death of a family member. Especially a sibling.

When I am done being busy, I will definitely come back to this story and find out more :)

Commenting as I read a long.

The summary was cool, I had never heard that before. It made me want to know what the story was about.

The layout is sweet, it's very clean and I love the bird divider thing, it's super cute. Your layout is chic.

I love the first paragraph, I mean it really hits home. The way you describe their crying it brings it to life and puts emotion into it. And I find myself wondering why they are crying like so.

The second chapter is actually pretty true especially when children are younger, even when they are older. The parents are the ones that make you believe everything will be okay, so great work. You've made this story more realistic.

I really feel for your character, the pain she must feel and the guilt. This is wonderfully written and I will be sure to read more and subscribe to this.
=D

Hello!

I love the new chapter. It's just the bittersweet way Reagan describes her sister that makes it really beautiful. Just how much she admired her sister and the way you write that they both changed in appearance. All angles and sharpness really stood out to me in comparison to Natalie's gentleness. Hoo hooo! Congrats on getting on Project Fiction because you totally deserve it matey!

I can't believe the nerve of those girls
God my heart broke at the end of chapter 3

Hmm, how did Natalie die? Reagan told those girls off! I honestly felt her depression. Made by want to go lie in my bed. I'm enjoying reading this story and can't wait for the next update.

Seeing this email update really made my day.. :) I'm so freaking excited for more! :D And her 'friends' what meanies. Didn't Reagan's character use to be 17? I'm sorry...just wonder.

EEEK!

I'd just like to tell you something that may shock you but I'm going to a social gathering yayayayay so I'm a bit unable to read it right now!!!! I swear to you once I get home I'll comment. If not, don't be afraid to slap me. :D

Loved the update!
I don't blame Reagan for being sad. I would be too if I were in her situation. In fact, it wouldn't make sense if she wasn't sad, you know? So I get where you're going with this depression-like state. I wrote a story where a girl lost her sister, and after reading your most recent update... I now feel like I did a horrible job with that. Because I don't think I made my character mourn over it enough. :/ When she really should have.
But anyway, back to your story... I can also relate to the story as well. Meaning, I can also feel the sadness because I could very well in fact go through the same situation. I have an older sister; I would be devastated and would blame myself if I were in a car crash with her, if I happened to be the only one to survive. :( I would be grieving just like Reagan is at the moment.
I can't believe those girls at the beginning. I mean, I'm sure they meant well and were really sad over the death of Natalie, but maybe they should have waited a little while before going to Reagan's house and asking that. For respect and all.
Hm... I found it a bit surprising that she allowed Tate to go ahead, though. But then again, Tate also showed signs of grieving, so she probably felt he was more sincere about it. And he seemed to be.
Enough with my rambling. lol. Sorry about that. :P Overall, great update! :)
Can't wait for more! :D

SO I'M NOT SLACKING THIS TIME, COS LEMME TELL YOU KNOW THAT THIS IS SIZE 300. In fact, I'm going to write my whole comment this way.
...
...
...
...

Okay, maybe not, because that's obnoxious but am I your loudest reader to date? Hmm hmmm?

Okay, I loved this second update. It was incredibly sad, and it's giving me so much insight as to what certain people may feel when they've lost someone. I dunno, I've never been to a funeral, and I've never lost anybody to death before, so I guess I'm very untouched by that part of life. And I nearly always tear up when people or pets or a cactus dies in a book, movie, tv show etcetera because maybe if I can't cry for people around me since they're very much alive (although my sister won't be if she keeps giggling over the phone grrrr) I can cry for characters who I've never met and never will unless for some weird yet totally normal reason I'm in a dream and they're there. Shit, I'm rambling, aren't I? HAHAHAH.

I love the name Tate. I once knew a boy called Tate but I didn't love him, but he was cool. I mean, he was troubled, lemme tell you that as well, and I guess the Tate in this story is troubled in a different way but I think that I'll like every Tate I meet or read or watch for the rest of my life. I like this Tate, because I like troubled boys and I need to stop saying that, because it can be totally embarrassing if he actually isn't troubled at all??

I hate funerals, I figure. I'm not strong enough for an event like that.

I love it, I really do.

(Was that a long comment? I hope it was, even if it wasn't very good quality and it was me talking about myself for half the time I don't know how to give goods ones but I really love this and I'll stop typing now except for the full stop followed by the bracket I'll put at the end of this sentence but wait I love you yeah okay hhaa.)

Aw... that was a sad second update.
I just... loved all your words describing how people react when someone they know loses someone close to them. Because they were incredibly accurate. They try to console you by comforting and and hugging you and it's like... that's the last thing a person wants. It shows respect, but they're already hurting enough, like Regan. :(
And speaking of, I love that name. Great choice. :)
Hm... and you also introduced us to another character in the second update. Tate. I can't wait to see what you have planned for him in this story, and what exactly you'll reveal to us about him.
So, amazing update, really. Can't wait for more. :D
<3