I'm Sorry - Comments

It's nice to see another BDSM erotica writer; very nifty story. I do have to say that personally, I would go back through and try to add a few more adjectives. It seems a little fast-paced for me. However, I did really enjoy it, and would love to read others, if you write any. :)

First off, I'd like to thank you very much for entering this in my contest. :) I really enjoyed your use of a larger sized font in the summary; I'm kind of a sucker for that. I liked the lyrics too; that's a great song. :) I must ask however; is there supposed to be a picture at the top of the page? Otherwise I'm not sure why the story area would be moved down so far.

I love how you just immediately started into the story and in such an unusual way. I must admit that I'm not sure what the whole fertile and dom thing is about but nonetheless. :) I'm generally not a huge fan of BDSM stories but I liked the relationship you've created with these characters, even if it based off of another story on here. It would probably be a good idea, however, to mention that there is BDSM in your summary, since some people really don't like reading it at all. :)

I quite enjoyed this, although the sudden change in tone at the end was a little shocking. I also didn't understand who was speaking to Jaime when it was his section. I'm sure that I would probably have to read the prequel to fully understand that but without any further information, it just seems like it was randomly stuck in there. Nonetheless, thank you for entering this in my contest! :D