I really loved this. The way you worded everything and the descriptions you used were really beautiful, and just wow.
His hands grasping for something out of his reach, something he couldn’t even see but believed in with all of his aching and dying heart.
I really loved that line, and the emotion in it. I could really feel for him, even though specifics and things weren't named because they weren't necessary to tell the story.
And after all of that afterlife he’d never really lived, he fell in love with what could’ve been. What should’ve been. Oh, he should have and he would have, but oh no, he couldn’t. Eight years could be a lot and it was. Time waits on no one, boy or man, and he knew that. He carried it to bed with him at night and dreamed of happiness, maybe for once living with a smile when he was dead.
I don't know why, but that whole part was almost like the climax of the whole story. It seemed to bring everything together, everything that he was feeling, and sum it up in such a lovely way. It was beautiful. <3 This was a great piece, nice job! :D
His hands grasping for something out of his reach, something he couldn’t even see but believed in with all of his aching and dying heart.
I really loved that line, and the emotion in it. I could really feel for him, even though specifics and things weren't named because they weren't necessary to tell the story.
And after all of that afterlife he’d never really lived, he fell in love with what could’ve been. What should’ve been. Oh, he should have and he would have, but oh no, he couldn’t. Eight years could be a lot and it was. Time waits on no one, boy or man, and he knew that. He carried it to bed with him at night and dreamed of happiness, maybe for once living with a smile when he was dead.
I don't know why, but that whole part was almost like the climax of the whole story. It seemed to bring everything together, everything that he was feeling, and sum it up in such a lovely way. It was beautiful. <3 This was a great piece, nice job! :D