April 24th, 2017 at 07:44am
I love how you connected this and the other one-shot about prom, Stuck, because it let us see Kandi's point of view. (If that isn't what you were going for, then oops, but that's the impression I got.) Anywho, I really liked this. I'm glad Kandi realized at the end of the one-shot that she felt the same for Logan. I was starting to think he was lusting after someone who didn't want him back.
Once again, another great piece!
This was a sweet piece. I liked that it was from Kandi's point of view so we got a bit of a glance into what is going on with her. It was interesting to see how she was so oblivious to Logan's feelings, since all of the stories where the focus is more on him clearly show how in love with her he is. I enjoyed seeing the dynamic between Kandi and her friends, though I wish that we could have seen a bit more of those relationships. I think it would have helped Kandi's character development to see those friendships developed a bit more.
I also thought this story was lacking a bit in description. Maybe because it was written in first person instead of third person, but the descriptions felt a bit choppy and spaced out. There were spots that felt like they could use more emotion, so we could really get inside Kandi’s head and find out exactly how she was feeling.
I did like the progression of the story though. How, at the beginning, Kandi was sort of denying her feelings and was determined about them being just friends, to realizing she was in love with him at the end. I thought everything flowed really smoothly.
Overall, great job. Thanks for entering!