Losing Myself - Comments

Wow, I really loved this. I'm not that great with leaving like huge, long comments but I thought it fit. Great job.

Something you should have added was possibly explain more about the mother and what happened to her and why she was a drunk. Did she lose her husband? Did he walk out on the family? Was she raped? That's something that I was wondering. But then again, if you would have added that, it might have not flowed better. I don't know, just throwing ideas out.

The one thing that I loved is how you captured something that is sadly happening all the time, like teens doing drugs and having sex just so they can leave their bad home life. It's just sad really. But I really loved this. And you are a good writer so I will be definitely checking out some of your other stories.

Never mind about the whole one-shot or chaptered speech. Totally just saw “Status: Finished.”

I just want to point out that I almost joined the same contest, but decided against it, obviously. Anyways, I want to say something, but nothing comes to mind besides that it has that good ol’ Krystina charm that your stories have; the glaze of humour and a sprinkle of imagery with such a serious story as the cake. Though, I do have to say the story does seem a little overdone, not saying it's not believable or couldn't happen it's just life's getting cliché, but I'm also confused about whether it's a one-shot or a chaptered story. If it's a chaptered story try to play around with what you have, if not or you don't have time, don't panic. I also want to point out one typo or something: “Disgusted with myself, and turned away from the mirror and walked out the door.”' I think you meant to say: “Disgusted with myself, I turned away.” You mixed the “I” with “and.”

And before I go, I read the rules for the contest and one of the rule where for an original layout. Now, I would contact the host(ess) on what (s)he means by “original,” just because I don't want you to get disqualified for some petty thing. It probably just means anything but the default, but better safe than sorry. So, good luck with it. ;)