Empath - Comments

Your summary is really intriguing. It really is, I'm a sucker for those kind of stories where a person with no options and no hope are like, wallowing in their sad life and suddenly, they become quite...extraordinary. I'm curious to know what happens to this Mark character so good job on getting the reader interested already in the summary :D

You know, you're quite heavy with the descriptions but it isn't a bad thing in this story, surprisingly. Instead of having a huge block of paragraphs about descriptions that just make you go, "Woah, okay.", you managed to weave them quite nicely into the story and they actually act to the mood and the setting of the story. Oh my god, major cliffhanger ending to the first chapter. The fact that Mark experienced some sort of uneasy sensation as soon as he made contact with the man makes me think that the man is some sort of supernatural being. And I wonder what happened to Mark to make him black out :O Great job, you've really managed to capture the reader's attention and arouse their curiosity. Great job once again :)

Another amazing chapter =]

I get really excited when I see there's another chapter up for this!

Admittedly, he felt as though he’d just gone through the spin cycle of a dryer that someone had thrown several bricks into I love how your descriptions really make it clear what you're trying to say. This is so much better than the usual "felt like shit" you usually see around!

Closing the door, he let the water run as he disrobed.. Okay that made me giggle, I know it shouldn't have, but I've never seen "disrobed" outside of a Harry Potter fanfiction before lol not a bad thing, just thought I'd share =]

As always, I'm totally hooked and can't wait for more! =]

Interesting plot you seem to have going here (: I really like the idea, even though I'm a bit confused (I've learnt that if the story is a tad confusing at first, it usually ends up being epic.)

I like how you write but I get a bit put off with how you word your descriptions. There's nothing wrong with, it just makes me read twice. But the imagery you create with your words is amazing.

The second chapter ended so quickly and I was like, wait what it's over? Haha but I look forward to the next chapter as you've got me interested o.O

xxxx <3

Gosh, I don't think I can explain how much I love this story.
<3

I'm seriously faling in love with your writing style =]

Your use of descriptive words and metaphors really is amazing!

Some of my favourite lines:

The room sloughed away like oil paint off a canvas

Packed bags jumbled in a corner of a room that thrummed with childhood., that last bit, just wow, seriously.

As the maelstrom quickened, he felt as if he were sinking into molasses; into a thick wetness that choked consciousness from him. The imagery I got from this line was gross lol I just found out what molasses were the other day, so just wow, and slightly gross, but perfect comparison for the feeling I think =]

I'm looking forward to more, especially to see where this is headed =]

Wow, I want more!!

That was really good, it was really well written!

In one corner, an old wardrobe stood forlorn and decrepit, stooped under the weight of its contents.

I loved that description, I could seriously see it in my head! In fact the description almost makes me sad, I feel sorry for a wardrobe, never thought I'd say something like that!

Two: The gothic couple upstairs are fucking. Again. Noisily.

That reminded me of last year in a residential college at uni lol made me laugh a bit

If the borderline-frightening screams from the two upstairs paired with the guttural screeches of the mood music they’d put on hadn’t woken him up, nothing would.

I seriously love the way you describe gothic sex haha

And as for your last paragraph, I was completely riveted the whole time, didn't see it coming, and then it ended and I was seriouly like "where's the next chapter button?"

I'm really looking forward to reading more of this =]