Monster - Comments

This piece starts out with a wonderful, interesting description. I love the idea of the monsters lips being ‘cherry coloured’ and the heart being ‘big as the world’ – they both come across as unusual, almost sexual, connotations of a monster. I really like the way you constantly refer to the character as ‘Monster’ and your descriptions are amazing. You use words and comparisons that would never cross my mind, and that’s why this piece is so unusual, so unique. The way you start every paragraph with a referral to the monsters heart or their cherry lips, it’s really effective and memorable.

I’m guessing this piece is written about the person in the layout but I’m intrigued as to who this is. You’ve made them into a complex character and it’s clear you’ve got to dig down deeper than appearances to find about them properly. I think you did a good job of letting the reader inside the personality of the monster. Good job!

I don’t really know what to say about this other than it was completely wonderful. But I really liked the repetition that was used throughout the whole piece; and it seemed that there was a different phrase that was used multiple times depending on the paragraph.

But anyway, this felt poetic to me. It’s just like the whole thing was about describing this monster. How he was kind but also felt a little bit… demonic. Well, his appearance seemed demonic to me. Anyway, what really surprised me was the very last sentence. It was just like a slap in the face or something. But it was the perfect ending it seems. Anyway, like I said before, this was just fantastic.