Colour - Comments

  • tabula rasa.

    tabula rasa. (120)

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    I only read a few chapters, and I'm not familiar with the fandom, but I think you've got a great story going. I'm sure that anyone familiar with the fandom would enjoy this. Your narration is really good and the dialogue flows well and doesn't feel awkward to read. Good luck with the story! Cute
    June 5th, 2012 at 08:53pm
  • thegreathendowski

    thegreathendowski (100)

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    I really like this story. I'm not a big fan of hetero fics involving F-sexy but I decided to branch out a bit with the help of the comment swap and I like it. I think that the chapter lengths could be a bit longer( but that's highly hypocritical coming from me) I read a lot of YM@6 fics because I have an obsession and this one's different to quite a few that I've read or tried to read (short attention span.)
    June 5th, 2012 at 02:30pm
  • jade_

    jade_ (100)

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    First off, I cannot express to you how anxious I was that I was going to get a story I didn't like, but as soon as I saw that it was a Josh story, I definitely stressed less :) But all that aside, it was your writing and the way you opened the story that definitely reaffirmed my confidence in this story.

    I'm not usually a big fan of first person narration, but the way you have written the first two chapters has me thinking otherwise. I personally always found it hard to write, but you make it seem so easy. The way you have characterised Nina really leaves the mystery constant within the story, and it definitely makes me want to read more. Hopefully I'll be able to sooner rather than later ! :)

    I really enjoyed the metaphor of the wallflower that you repeated throughout the first two chapters, and the way in which you have Josh going after the girl, rather than Nina going after him (from what I have read). I've never really read a You Me At Six story in comparison, but in a lot of fan fictions, it's not always the case, so it's definitely refreshing.

    The only thing I can really think of as constructive criticism, is to work on the length of your chapters. They seem to start and disappear before I've really got to slip into Nina's mind and surroundings, just as I'm getting used to it. It's probably just personal preference, but maybe just try and expand on ideas she is thinking, or describing the situation in order to create a slightly longer chapter. (Keeping in mind I've only read through the first two, so maybe that differs from where you are up to in the story now, if so, I apologise)

    Other than that, keep up the good work. I'm looking forward to getting around to reading the rest of it :)
    June 5th, 2012 at 11:39am
  • Sonshine.

    Sonshine. (100)

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    NO, YOU MUST UPDATE RIGHT NOW. YOU HAVE NO CHOICE.

    Seriously, I never listened to You Me At Six before, but the Mibba story swapper recommended this story. I really like it so far. The grammar is perfect, and I just love the little quirks you put in because they're in England. I just love when boys say 'love'. :D Please, you must update! You are leaving me hanging here!

    P.S. I have a really bad feeling about her ex-boyfriend :c
    June 5th, 2012 at 08:15am
  • saveredheads

    saveredheads (100)

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    This story is perfect! :)
    May 31st, 2012 at 01:17am
  • mcaj

    mcaj (100)

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    I really like this story and the way you write (: Next chapter better be coming soon! haha xx
    May 31st, 2012 at 01:05am
  • HisGirl

    HisGirl (100)

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    I love it so much<3
    May 30th, 2012 at 10:50pm
  • liv-wat-up

    liv-wat-up (100)

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    i am in love with this story! how is josh so cute?!
    May 30th, 2012 at 01:43am
  • ChristyRawr

    ChristyRawr (100)

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    Keep writing please!:)
    May 24th, 2012 at 02:45am
  • lorenmoore

    lorenmoore (100)

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    This. Is. Fantastic.
    May 23rd, 2012 at 07:23pm
  • saveredheads

    saveredheads (100)

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    So sorry for not commenting! I read these on my phone and I can't comment from there but anyways this story is excellent and well written :)
    May 23rd, 2012 at 04:04pm
  • leighanna28

    leighanna28 (100)

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    Max is a dick. But I like that we (and Josh) are seeing a different side of Nina. This story really gets better every time you update, I love it.
    May 23rd, 2012 at 02:56pm
  • lorenmoore

    lorenmoore (100)

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    I LOVE THIS STORY!!
    May 5th, 2012 at 05:11am
  • lorenmoore

    lorenmoore (100)

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    I LOVE THIS STORY!!
    May 5th, 2012 at 05:11am
  • LookingUp93

    LookingUp93 (100)

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    Can't wait for the next chapter ;D
    May 2nd, 2012 at 02:05pm
  • SJRD123

    SJRD123 (100)

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    This story is one of the best I have read in a while! I can't wait to see how it plays out.
    May 1st, 2012 at 04:15pm
  • saveredheads

    saveredheads (100)

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    Aww that chapter was wonderful!! :)
    May 1st, 2012 at 02:31am
  • saveredheads

    saveredheads (100)

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    I just found this story and so far it's perfect. Can't wait for another chapter!
    March 23rd, 2012 at 04:42pm
  • joshfranceschi

    joshfranceschi (100)

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    great start to a lovely story c:
    March 23rd, 2012 at 04:55am
  • HisGirl

    HisGirl (100)

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    Can't wait for another chapter!
    March 23rd, 2012 at 12:13am