Dream of Me - Comments

This is a really interesting concept :) I shall come back a read more later, definitely. The idea of being connected through dreams but then not knowing if what you're experiences is real or not is really cool.

Everything was written really beautifully. I could picture exactly what was going on, but with my own little add-ins. Maybe a little more details on the environment would help, but the actually feelings were really good. You could tell when he was in the dream because everything seemed vivid, but slightly off. I really enjoyed that.

The only negative things really were the font size (I had to really lean into my screen to read it) and the transition between reality and the dream in the first chapter. The problem of his Dreamer being possibly dead seemed to be resolved too fast for how it was introduced... it kind of made me question why the problem had been developed as much as it had been. So that might be something to think about.

But over-all, I'm subbing so I can keep reading this. I really like it

The font made it really hard to read + you should look at how your sentences are connected and phrased.. It's a little hard to understand at times, and the small font doesn't really help :/

I haven't read the whole thing yet, but the story line is really good, so I'll finish it later : D

You're a great writer, so with a few adjustments this would be amazing - keep it up! :)

You should make the font bigger. And the title is difficult to read, along with the story as the font is absolutely tiny! I love your main characters. Watch your phrasing. I really enjoyed reading, this though. It's just so good. Thank you, comment swap!

I just you make the font just a tad bit bigger as it can be difficult to read at times. However, that aside, this story was wonderful. I love both the main characters. There are a few grammar mistakes. I second 'harlequin. girl.' on the matter of phrasing, but most the other mistakes are small and negligible. I really enjoyed reading this, and I'm glad I had the opportunity to get to know such wonderful characters.

I've never read anything like this before, it's lovely. The idea in itself is so sweet, and it's written really well. I've only read the first two chapters, but it's amazing and I'm already in love with it. Noah seems like a really good, solid character, and they way you describe things is excellent. Keep it up. :)

Very original plot & a cute, neat layout. The summary had me interested, but there were multiple mistakes within: the phrase Angel Reed was still recovering from the death of her parents four years later might more effectively be presented as something like “Four years after her parent’s death, Angel read was still recovering and now dealing with the annoyance and invitation of…” This version is both more concise and more coherent. Also, your introduction of Noah Noah Brady, a nineteen year old on his own in ignorance to his family of the last three years, wasn't just your average adolescent. is just as backwards in phrasing. Maybe rearranging the clauses to the effect of “Nineteen-year-old Noah Brady hadn’t been just your average adolescent for the past three years, despite his family’s ignorance of this fact” is something you might want to do. Also, phrases like “deepest blue eyes” and “[his] smile…made her heart jump” are very clichés and you may want to think of revising them into something more original.
The intro to your story is sort of confusing but I found myself very interested in the plot of Noah, the spade, having to meet his dreamer. I liked your descriptions like I was sixteen years old, pressing my back against the wall and taking small, silent steps to get closer to my father’s study, where he and mother were talking in the most hushed tones. and I pushed her away from me, jumping to my feet; I bit my trembling lip hard enough to make it bleed. I wouldn’t appear weak not in front of them or anyone else for that matter.
Best of luck!

I was hooked just by the summary page! I couldn't wait to read this story. Everything pulled me in and I quickly fell in love with the characters. Grammar was great! Definitely subscribing! Post the next chapter up now! Lol

Reading the summary, I definitely think it already has a really awesome plot. I've never read anything like it and it's super interesting! I think that's so cool, that he can walk into dreams and whatnot. It's like she literally is meeting the boy of her dreams! I'm so excited to read this! :3

I really, like I said before, love the idea of this. And when he thought he didn't have a soulmate I found it absolutely heart-breaking. I couldn't even imagine knowing that you were going to be alone for the rest of your life, that you'd never meet that special someone, I couldn't even begin to comprehend that, and I think you did a really wonderful job conveying those feelings through Noah. I mean, my heart was definitely breaking for him.

I liked too how it wasn't very info-dumpy, but just sprinkled throughout the chapter, easy to pick up and not bore me to tears like a lot of stories do. You really did a good job with that!

And too, they were absolutely adorable together, aw. I almost died of cuteness. c:

My only thing would be your tags/dialogue are incorrect.
For instance, while you have something like "Why would you think that?" She asked softly
would actually be "Why would you think that?" she asked softly

Otherwise, great beginning! :3

Found this lovely little gem thanks to comment swap, and it's pretty good! I must say, the first chapter seems a tad rushed, but maybe the reason becomes apparent later on. (I only read the first chapter.) Your grammar and spelling were nearly flawless. Great job! :D

Oh...my god. I just stayed up to finish reading this because like factory girl, I received it courtesy of the comment swap and I am utterly in love with this story. It is so amazing. I was hooked by the first chapter. Blissfully, utterly perfect.

I have a few points of criticism, but nothing particularly major.
For one, I don't understand how Angel is so quick to get so angry with Noah. Especially during the first few chapters. I understand her frustration because I would be equally as frustrated after years of just dreams, but she should have at least tried to understand the trouble and suffering Noah was going through as well as her. She came off a bit selfish at times, acting as if she were honestly the only one suffering in the relationship. Angel doesn't really give me the best feeling because of this. Otherwise, she's okay. I just suggest you develop her a bit better at this point because her life is changing, making her less selfish and more understanding about what is happening rather than getting so angry.
Noah is a sweetheart, the end. He is beautiful.

Also, in the writing sense, you sometimes miss a word in a sentence. Quite literally, not in the sense that it's awkward sentence structure or anything. It really is you missing a word. I suggest that you read over your chapters carefully so this doesn't happen. It didn't happen often but I did catch it when it happened because I had to read the sentences over again with slight confusion of what was being said before I realized what it was supposed to be saying.

But this storyline is so amazing. And so, so original. Which is what I was hoping for by using the comment swap. I have not read a single story ever like this. I cannot wait for more of this! Great job.

so i just found this curtsey of comment swap and ill be honest im only up to chapter 6 cause its kinda 2am where i am and i cant keep my eyes open.
but i felt the need to comment cause i wanted to tell you how unique your story is i have found one on something simillar before and really couldnt force myself to read it. where your story im loving (i mean it is 2am).
and Noah is just gorgeous i dont understand Angels reaction to some of the things he says or does sometimes, cause if i was her i would just melt, where she tends to get rather angry.
but i love it ill comment again when i finish reading it :)

Poor Angel. Poor Noah . :'( that story about Cristo and Lidia was depressing.

I really like the developments so far and love her reaction to the change in her eye color. Keep it up ^_^

This story is really cool, I like it a lot! :)

Aww! My heart just melted.

I really just... WOW! How do you come up with this stuff! It's freaking amazing

I can't believe there are no comments! I absolutely love this story and can't wait to read more. It's amazing! :)