All That Glitters Ain't Gold - Comments

Comment swap.

You have a wonderful style of writing, it's fluent and engaging. The prologue begins very dramatic, which is effective because it immediately hooked me in making me wonder 'how did this girl end up like this?'. I also found it amusing that the main character, Essie, shares the same nickname as me! I enjoy the jumping back and forth between present time and past, it's adds a kind of twist to the plot and draws contrast between Essie's different emotional states. I've subscribed and recommended, well done!

" I used to be a different girl. The world used to be a different place. My life used to be a different story. Somehow, the pages got burned." I love this. It's something that I feel every female goes through, we all have that point in our lives where we step back and evaluate and wonder, how did I get here? I love the way you emphasized that thought process with the pages being burned. Your descriptions are so detailed, I envy how easily it seems they flow out of you. This: "I can feel the wind in my hair, but it's not the wind. It's the moments, the memories, the words that I'll never forget. It's the ghost of who I used to be, who I thought he was. It's what I did tonight. It's what I'll do tomorrow. It's what I did yesterday. It's not the wind. It's a reminder." is my favorite paragraph. I can just picture this girl standing there thinking all of this to herself. The imagery is fascinating. You are extremely talented. I am drawn in, hook line and sinker, definitely subscribing. Keep up the good work!

What a wonderful beginning! You just pulled me right in, it's amazing. Your detail is great, could you teach me how to do it? haha. I love the way you keep a constant detail, you didn't just have a few details here and there but throughout the entire chapter and its just a prolonge

You had me hooked as soon as you started talking about eyelashes. EYELASHES, out of everything. That's when you know you're a fantastic writer. However, that's not all I love. I love your attention to detail, how you describe everything, your diction and everything else about this chapter. "Somehow, the pages got burned." I love that. I think that's one of the best single sentences I've read on this entire website. Does that even make sense? Don't care! You're incredible! Subscribing right now, hun. Keep it up please :)

What an incredible start! This is the most captivated I have ever been by a single chapter! The scrupulous attention to detail allows an image to be drawn almost as soon as the story begins. I loved reading this and I can't wait for more. I'm a definite subscriber. Keep it up!