This isn't the type of story I would usually be attracted to, because of that sort of dark feeling it has to it, but I like how you write and since the plot isn't very clear, it left me wanting to know what would happen next. So, nice job. :) The only thing that I have to point out is that the paragraphs are all so stuck together. I don't know if it's just me, but when you don't indent I'm pretty sure you should leave a space between paragraphs. I don't maybe I'm wrong, but it sure makes reading easier. Happy writing. :)
The only thing that I have to point out is that the paragraphs are all so stuck together. I don't know if it's just me, but when you don't indent I'm pretty sure you should leave a space between paragraphs. I don't maybe I'm wrong, but it sure makes reading easier.
Happy writing. :)