I think the summary should actually be a summary of the story, and have what you currently have as the summary as the author's note. That would be more appropriate. Also, you had a semicolon instead of an apostrophe in it. But anyway, here's my con crit that's hopefully helpful :)
For small numbers like six and twelve, you should write them out and not just have the numbers, and have "to" instead of a hyphen.
...why I was here, what my Mum had said was the reason to why I’m here so long. - I think you should break this up into two sentences, both with a question mark at the end because you asking a question after all.
You see the problem is, well the reason is I have borderline personality disorder. - I just think that's a bit unnatural... I think it would be fine as "You see, the problem is that I have a borderline personality disorder." Or reason instead of problem, if you'd like.
... a time where... - it should be when, I believe. I wasn't too sure myself, so I googled it and found this, which was helpful.
I feel like you just said normal a lot. When I was normal, normally I'm fine, I'm as normal as the next person... Show them you've got a good ranging vocabulary.
Capio Nightingale or something, ... - I think there should be a full stop there, not a comma.
... iPod in my bag; I said... - full stop, not semicolon. I see a few other times that there should be a semicolon further down, so maybe you should look up how to use semicolons properly? Also just after this sentence, there's a random break and it goes to the next paragraph - it needs to be fixed.
I think there should be some more emotions in it. From what I've read so far, it sorta seems like just plot and descriptions, but not really how she feels. Is she nervous? Did she think the woman was fake and just acting polite and secretly judging her, which made her feel uncomfortable or upset? Etc. I think it would have been nice to have more emotions to give the story some more depth.
...and kind eyes, - I'm sure you know this, but that should be a full stop.
Next I see that you don't know how to write dialogue properly. The "she" afterwards shouldn't have a capital letter, and you should have commas instead of full stops at the end of their speech. Definitely worth searching on Google how to do that properly.
Why did she mentally slap herself for using the same word? How did doing that that make her feel and why?
I sat on my new bed, it was actually very comfortable, and looked around. - I think you should just say "I sat on my new comfortable bed", because breaking up the sentence like that makes it a bit weird.
I don't really think you need to describe her unpacking everything. That's boring, and we know she's got clothes that go in a wardrobe, and that she has a toothbrush, etc.
i’nae - I don't know what that's supposed to be...
During the speech you put a lot of commas at the end of sentences instead of full stops. It's like you've got it backwards - in dialogue, comma. Normal sentence, full stop.
I also don't think you need to have all the extra Scottish accent adjustments to the words. I think we can all imagine it for ourselves, and it's a bit tricky to read sometimes.
I think you said "smile" a lot too. Make sure you alternate between words to keep it interesting and not repetitive.
I think it's a bit weird that she didn't find out sooner that they had an animal ward (on her first day or when she read the pamphlet).... Just saying...
I think that was an interesting story.... I don't think the last paragraph was needed, really. It seemed complete without it.
Now that I've read the whole thing, I'd like to point something out that was at the start - you said "to be honest with you', as in addressing the reader, but you never did that again in the rest of the story. I would take out the "with you", or the honest part.
For small numbers like six and twelve, you should write them out and not just have the numbers, and have "to" instead of a hyphen.
...why I was here, what my Mum had said was the reason to why I’m here so long. - I think you should break this up into two sentences, both with a question mark at the end because you asking a question after all.
You see the problem is, well the reason is I have borderline personality disorder. - I just think that's a bit unnatural... I think it would be fine as "You see, the problem is that I have a borderline personality disorder." Or reason instead of problem, if you'd like.
... a time where... - it should be when, I believe. I wasn't too sure myself, so I googled it and found this, which was helpful.
I feel like you just said normal a lot. When I was normal, normally I'm fine, I'm as normal as the next person... Show them you've got a good ranging vocabulary.
Capio Nightingale or something, ... - I think there should be a full stop there, not a comma.
... iPod in my bag; I said... - full stop, not semicolon. I see a few other times that there should be a semicolon further down, so maybe you should look up how to use semicolons properly? Also just after this sentence, there's a random break and it goes to the next paragraph - it needs to be fixed.
I think there should be some more emotions in it. From what I've read so far, it sorta seems like just plot and descriptions, but not really how she feels. Is she nervous? Did she think the woman was fake and just acting polite and secretly judging her, which made her feel uncomfortable or upset? Etc. I think it would have been nice to have more emotions to give the story some more depth.
...and kind eyes, - I'm sure you know this, but that should be a full stop.
Next I see that you don't know how to write dialogue properly. The "she" afterwards shouldn't have a capital letter, and you should have commas instead of full stops at the end of their speech. Definitely worth searching on Google how to do that properly.
Why did she mentally slap herself for using the same word? How did doing that that make her feel and why?
I sat on my new bed, it was actually very comfortable, and looked around. - I think you should just say "I sat on my new comfortable bed", because breaking up the sentence like that makes it a bit weird.
I don't really think you need to describe her unpacking everything. That's boring, and we know she's got clothes that go in a wardrobe, and that she has a toothbrush, etc.
i’nae - I don't know what that's supposed to be...
During the speech you put a lot of commas at the end of sentences instead of full stops. It's like you've got it backwards - in dialogue, comma. Normal sentence, full stop.
I also don't think you need to have all the extra Scottish accent adjustments to the words. I think we can all imagine it for ourselves, and it's a bit tricky to read sometimes.
I think you said "smile" a lot too. Make sure you alternate between words to keep it interesting and not repetitive.
I think it's a bit weird that she didn't find out sooner that they had an animal ward (on her first day or when she read the pamphlet).... Just saying...
I think that was an interesting story.... I don't think the last paragraph was needed, really. It seemed complete without it.
Now that I've read the whole thing, I'd like to point something out that was at the start - you said "to be honest with you', as in addressing the reader, but you never did that again in the rest of the story. I would take out the "with you", or the honest part.
Good luck :)