깡패 - Comments

I really like how different this story is from all the others on this sight. There were no typos or mistakes, at least none that I could spot. It definitely gives the impression that you are knowledgable and have a passion for the culture, if I am mistaken then my apologies. That is merely the impression that I got. I do have to disagree with one of the comments about the "unnecessary background info", I think it makes it more intriguing and enticing, I am curious even more so now to know what happened to the brother. I think giving slight, vague, background information adds to it, not take away from it. You seem like you have all of this planned out and it is very delphic, and that is being said in a positive way.

Yes, I’m recommending you, maybe for the fact that I couldn’t spot any typos and mistakes, and maybe for the fact that it completely rocked. You must be a very interesting person with many intriguing experiences or maybe knowledge. It seemed very real. I’m thinking you know what you’re writing about. Good job. I’ll be reading the next chapters.
Mistakes in chapter 1:
It had been a long time since I'd seen my brother. I was still too young to really understand what had happened when he was……..fact, our mother complained to me that he hadn't said more than a few sentences in all those weeks he spent with her. I didn't know what happened to him. He never told me about it, and I didn't press it. (I think this was just completely unnecessary background info.)

This story is still very good, and is very intriguing, I can't wait to read more, I can't wait to see where this story will go. I feel it has very good potential and that you're writing style is very good. I like how you've been descriptive, it's not too much and not too little, I hope you keep this story going.

Although I agree that your writing does need polishing, this story has potential. It's absolutely unique, on a website where 99% of people write teenage smut about a very small group of fandoms.
Read more History textbooks, more good novels and try to find the best fictions on mibba, because the more you read, the better you will write.
But I give you props for creativity and thinking outside the box.

Ummmm, I don’t know what to think of this story, whether it has potential or not, but I can say a few points. You have a good idea going on here; it is not like a typical everyday story. Props for that. But, I suggest you up your writing style for good measure. Put in more description to slow down the story. Also, your characters need to be more pronounced. Especially J-ssi needs more mystery and more attitude. Keep it up :)

This is so interesting!! I love it. I'm incredibly fascinated by gangs and it excites me that there's actually a story like this on mibba c:

HEY REMEMBER ME. Yeah. Mibba is still being suckish. Sorry for like, annoying you and like, spamming this story basically since Mibba's being really stupid. It's like, "HELLOOO. I'D LIKE TO USE COMMENT SWAP?" I would like to eat food too. A lot of food.

And honestly, Mibba is just being suckish so. Like, I'm sorry about this but it won't let me read or comment on another story so. It could be because I haven't used Comment Swap in a while, but y'know. Sigh. Anyway, again, I'm sorry for the rambling comment and blah blah blah. I did re-read it though and it was still confusing and weird, but if it's what you're interested in, I have no right to judge you on it.

This confused me more than a kitten with roller blades. Nonetheless, I really liked it. It helped me learn a lot about Japanese things, like, I had no idea they had gangs. It's kind of racist but I thought they were all working on inventing new technology and stuff. I've never been into Japanese stuff besides some manga, and I don't even read that anymore. This was really cool though. I like where you're going with the story, and the summary really briefs you on what to expect. I'm excited to see where it goes!

And I guess Mibba sent me back or something because...yeah, here I am. So I'm just copying and pasting and adding this note so.

This confused me more than a kitten with roller blades. Nonetheless, I really liked it. It helped me learn a lot about Japanese things, like, I had no idea they had gangs. It's kind of racist but I thought they were all working on inventing new technology and stuff. I've never been into Japanese stuff besides some manga, and I don't even read that anymore. This was really cool though. I like where you're going with the story, and the summary really briefs you on what to expect. I'm excited to see where it goes!

This is a very good idea, and the way you wrote the story line sucked me in almost instantly. I can't wait to read more. I hope that your ideas keep coming and that the story keeps getting better.

I think this is a very unique idea, and I like seeing things like this on Mibba. It seems that you did a bit of research, which I applaud you if you did. That can only improve your story and your writing.

The first chapter is very engaging, and it makes me as a reader want to read more. I also thought the picture you added was interesting, though I'm not sure what it pertains to. But it's still pretty cool. The story itself is very well- written and I saw no mistakes in your grammar or spelling. I think you can go far with this story, and I hope you continue.
Very well done, and good luck on your future writing!

Alright, so I'm here for comment swap, I have to say first that despite trying to be open minded about this, I really have no interest in this subject. I do think that you have a unique plot and idea for the story in general, but it just isn't my favourite thing.

I wasn't a huge fan of your layout, the guy on the background was kind of cut off by the content part, so it didn't really think it was necessary for him to be there, haha. I liked how you had the grey font on the black background, because it wasn't hard on the eyes like a white font would be.

The story itself is very well-written, I didn't notice any grammar or punctuation mistakes, which was awesome.

Overall, I think this is a well written and unique story, so good luck with writing the rest of it! :)